The Holder Series 51-100

51. Holder of Illusion

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask the worker there if “The Holder of Illusion” is housed here.

If the worker nods, you are doomed. The Holder has anticipated your arrival and you will feel your body slowly begin to fade out of existence. It is not a pleasant experience.

If the worker answers no, be thankful. She will hand you a sheet of paper with directions on getting to the proper asylum and ask you to leave. Do so, turn left, and throw away the paper. You don’t want to alert this Holder to your coming before it is necessary.

Walk four blocks down the road in the direction you’re heading, then turn right and walk one, then left and walk two, then stop, scratch your chin, and turn around. The street has changed- all the color has drained from the world in front of you. A huge crater gapes from the center of the street. Not a pane of glass remains intact, and all the people you might have passed on that block lie horribly dead.

Take a step back. There should be a red paint-pen on the ground beside you- grab it and stuff it into your pocket. As you watch, the discoloration effect slowly spreads, revealing what looks like the aftermath of a military attack on a black-and-white world: smashed buildings, blasted streets, and dead people everywhere.

Quickly cover your eyes with your hands and shout, “I deny the truth! Let the path remain!” If the Holder deems you unworthy, you will suffer the same fate as the block, and the effect you saw will continue to spread, wiping the illusion clean from our world.

But if you pass, a slight tingle will shoot through your legs, just barely powerful enough to be felt. Open your eyes. The effect is still spreading, but you stand fully as you were in the middle of its ruin. Walk straight down the block until you come to a warehouse. The main doors, though bent and dinged, still stand strong. Next to the doors is a building name-plate, like the ones you see on firehouses and the like, but completely blank.

Take out the paint-pen and write on the plate, as small as you can while still writing legibly, “Who survived to tell of it?”

The ink will pool into a dot, and then begin to drip- much like blood- down the plate. It will describe the survivor, telling his tale of horror and sadness, and the ends to which he fell in an attempt to get the tale out, to try to ensure that it would not happen again. Slowly, you will get the horrible feeling that the Holder himself was the survivor spoken of.

He will assure you that this is not true, however, and end the tale with “His fate bears not for the telling, but his legacy lives on.”

The paint-pen will melt in your hand, and the side door to the warehouse will crash open. Run inside- do not walk- and enter the manager’s office. It will be completely dark, but dare you not light it up in any way, lest you awaken the guardian from his dreams. Instead, grope around on the desk until you feel an object, round and smooth in your hands.

The office will flash out of sight, and you will get a brief glimpse of the massacred street, in full color, before everything goes black.

You will wake up two days later sitting at the kitchen table in your home. A newspaper nearby screams of a terrorist attack. Sit up, and you’ll realize that you still hold the object. Set it on the table.

The object you see before you is a steel ball, about the size of a walnut, and is Object 51 out of 538.

52. Holder of Disgust

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask to visit someone who calls himself “The Holder of Disgust”. The worker’s face will turn a bit green and he will excuse himself and then walk to the nearest toilet. A female warden will appear beside you and ask you to follow her. Obey her, for now.

She will lead you to a simple door with a number on it; you might remember it from somewhere else. Almost as if you’ve been here a long time ago. I will not tell you what the number on the door will be, but if it is not the right one, your fate will be one of eternal pain and nausea. Should the number be the right one, you will find yourself in a room that looks much like a person’s stomach. You will see food being digested, wandering into the lower tracts of the digestive cycle. It will look much more horrible than you’ve ever imagined.

Simply wait until you see a door falling into the room, then enter it. If you can not enter it then you will slowly be digested, just like everything else in here.

Should you have managed to enter the door, you will find yourself in a room with pure, white walls. Those are one of the few things that do not drive this Holder mad. You are not one of these things, however, so be prepared to run as fast as you can if necessary. Approach the girl in the middle of the room and ask her: “What do you consider pure?” She will stare at you and open her mouth, trying to speak. But she will be unable to, and instead vomit onto the floor. Close your eyes for as long as you hear her emptying her stomach.

When you no longer hear anything, open your eyes again and walk to where the girl was. Take the pills at your feet.

These pills are Object 52 of 538. Eating one will cause you to vanish as the girl did.

53. Holder of the Anvil

In any city, in any country in the world, go to any mental institution or hospital and tell the attendant that you wish to see the “Holder of the Anvil”. A moment, an hour, an eon will pass as you see the world’s every failure reflected in his eyes. You will see the ending of things—daughters tearing strips of flesh from their mothers with hooks of steel and bone, fathers feasting on the eyes of their sons—and you will know that you have given them their torment. Their anguish will be your own and the only way to escape is to let your cry join theirs, but give no sign that you know this or the attendant will turn away and all hope with him.

An eon, an hour, a moment will pass and the attendant will drop his eyes in defeat, turn, and open the door behind him. Follow him with care; he is treacherous and will leave you in dark places where your screams will never be heard, your bones never found. At the end of this path, when the skulls of infants crunch beneath your feet, you will find a young man chained to a ragged iron slab. Your guide will turn and offer you a hammer in one hand, a blade in the other.

If you take the blade, you will abandon your search and you should beg for a quick end. It will not be given. You should take the hammer, and when you do, drive it into the young man’s head with all the strength you have and more. Although he is innocent, allow no mercy, for mercy has abandoned you.

Cover the skulls at your feet in the gore and the blood. When their debt has been paid you will be delivered back to your world outside of the asylum. The hammer will still be in your hand; the blood will never wash off. Its thirst has been satisfied for now.

That hammer is Object 53 of 538. It will only be used once more, to split the world and find the secret heart that beats within.

54. Holder of the File

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask to visit someone who calls himself “The Holder of The File”. Should a look of pain and worry come over the face of the worker, you will be taken deep within the facility.

Beyond a myriad of twists and turns, far more than there should be in a building of this size, you will be taken to an old-style jail cell. Within will be darkness, and one single noise. The rasp of a file against metal. Should at any time the rasping stop, quickly turn and run. Run as far and as fast as you possibly can, and don’t worry about taking the wrong path. Getting lost in the depths of this facility will be the least of your worries.

Should the rasping continue unabated, however, walk up to the bars and stick a hand into the darkness. You will feel an object placed into your hand. If it feels warm, drop it and fall to your knees in prayer. Pray you were fast enough, so that when you look up you will still be outside this cell. If you were too slow, an eternity of filing will never get you past those bars again.

Should the item feel cold, however, voice one question aloud into the cell and pull back your hand. The only question to receive an answer will be, “Which side are they on?”

You will feel the file in your hand begin to move. As it shreds your skin and wears through your bones, you must concentrate not on the pain but on your question. The file will rasp away your flesh and bone until nothing left of your hand remains. Should you make it through this ordeal without giving in to the pain, you will find the answer to your question in your mind. Your hand will be whole, and once more you will be outside the facility, a cold and rusty file clutched in your hand.

Many go mad with this knowledge; some use the file to repeat the process in an attempt to remove the words from their heads. If you manage to endure, you will find yourself among those at the reunion.

That file is Object 54 of 538

55. The Holder of Cruelty

In a location where dark omens gather and where death has cursed, call to the starless sky for counsel with “The Holder of Cruelty”. Before the tainted earth which you stand will rise a black, ancient pedestal with a deep bowl carved into the crumbling skull mounted atop.

At this point, there is no return. The eyes of the decaying skull will glow with a color of blood, and in your head, a wicked yet hoarse voice will drone:

“Mors ultima linea rerum est”

Blackening until the night defeated, in that bowl must you gather the beating hearts of the ones you hold dearest to you. Should the hearts cease to beat, you will Blacken. Should you fail the request, you will Blacken. Should suicide become the final escape, you will Blacken.

With the fresh, organic beating hearts gathered in the dark bowl, the Blackening will cease. As the hearts liquefy, a deep, impenetrable black forms. The voices of those offered will speak to you in an unfamiliar tongue. Though incomprehensible, do not fall prey to the command of the deceiving ones.

Instead, gather the corpses of five of your most hated enemies, and bring them to the pedestal. Down their throats must the tainted fluid pour. Not a drop must reach the soil of Earth. The five corpses will re-animate, rising as wicked puppets hailing to their cursed master, shape-shifting to twisted Blackened beings.

To Them you must feed five young, living children. Remorse of the slightest will not be tolerated in Their eyes. As the fresh blood of the children is drunk from their coursing veins, you must watch through the agony, screams, tears, and fear as they are devoured nearly whole. They will endure the pain of a century of torture as they are consumed.

When the ordeal has ended, They will surround you. They demand only one more relic: your own heart. Be hasteful – They do not feel pain as mortals do. As the unholy offering passes hands, it too will be consumed. The meal finished, the figures will merge and dissipate in a brilliant black aura, eclipsing the dark sky.

The silent whispers that consume your mind form Object 55.

56. Holder of Reality

In any city, in any country, go into any mental institution or halfway house you can get into. When you reach the front desk, ask to visit someone who calls himself “The Holder of Reality.” The receptionist will lead you up a flight of stairs that run much higher than it seems the building should be, before finally coming to a top floor, where you will find nothing more than a single door. As you approach the door, the receptionist will make herself scarce. At this point, you could turn around and look for said receptionist, but doing so will only get you lost in the halls of the mental institution forever. Instead, open the door, and continue inwards.

Inside that door, you will find a man sitting on an office chair, playing a game on a game console that you have never seen before. The console is a bizarre design, with a case made out of wrought iron, etched and painted in twisted, demonic designs. In the game, he is torturing a person with methods too horrifying for words. Once you come to the inevitable realization that his unwitting victim is in fact you, you will become your avatar in the game, and be forced to endure any torture his mind may devise, until the game finally ends.

The game can only end in one of two ways. You probably will go insane, in which case he will tear your very soul apart purely for his own delight. However, you might successfully endure the torture, and be granted the privilege of asking him a single question. If you ask him why you are in the game, he will force you to relive the entire game, in its entirety, repeatedly, for all eternity. Instead, you should ask him: “Why do you play?”

With that question, he will scream in agony, and the console will reset. You will now be sitting on the office chair, the game console and controller resting on the floor next to you. He will be staring at you through the T.V. screen, a look of unspeakable fear on his face. However tempting it may be, do not play the game. It probably is best to not even touch the game controller. Simply switch the console off, remove the game cartridge, and take it with you, leaving the console behind.

That cartridge contains Object 56 of 538.

57. Holder of the Truth

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask politely to visit someone who calls himself “The Holder of the Truth”. The worker will nod slightly, then turn back to what he was doing. He will not respond if you ask him again, but do not dare ask him a third time, for if you do he will show his true form to you and rend you into strips of flesh on the spot.

Turn to leave. The door has vanished, but there is a trapdoor in the floor that did not exist before. Open it. Preferably with something long; that gives you a better chance of escape should they be waiting for you on the other side. If they are, run; run as far into the asylum as you can. Find a window and jump out, for all the doors are barred or banished. Once you get out of the window, flee as far as you can, preferably crossing as much water as possible, for while it will not stop them, it will slow them. And you will require each second to make peace with your god.

If they are not waiting, jump through the trapdoor. You will land in a splendid library. People in exquisite and elaborate dress are everywhere, chatting, reading, and relaxing. Do not touch any of them or attempt to choose a book, for that is the trigger, and you do not want to pull it.

Look around- you have all the time you need. Eventually you will find a gray-haired man sitting at a desk, stamping an endless pile of books with an old “returned” stamp. Do not attempt to touch him or the books, for if you do all the pleasant people will reveal what they really look like, and if you are driven mad in an instant by what you see then, consider yourself lucky, for you will not feel the pain as they set upon you in a vehement rage.

Instead, ask the librarian one question, and one question only. “Which one holds His law?”

The librarian will look up. His eyes are a color not native to this Earth or even this galaxy; they are a color so impossible that you may be driven mad simply by their gaze. Steel yourself, and stare directly into his eyes. Do not break eye contact, or he will look back down, not wanting to view the scene as the other patrons set upon you. He will tell you a name. It is a long one, but he will give you a card to help remember it. Before you turn to look for the book, ask if he will check it out in advance. He will nod, and stamp the card.

Do not bother looking for the book. It has already been stolen from the library, and you must find it. Close your eyes and say three words: “Find the thief.”

Do not open your eyes for ten seconds, for if the prior adventures have not driven you mad, what you see then will.

After ten seconds have passed, open your eyes. You will be across the street from the asylum, still holding the card.

That card is Object 57 of 538. You have checked out the book; it is now your duty to return it.

58. Holder of Lies

In any city, in any country, go to any insane asylum or halfway house you can get yourself to. When you get there, walk up to the front desk and ask to see someone who calls himself “The Holder of Lies”. The worker will nod cheerily, then get up and gesture for you to follow him. So will about seven other people in the area. Ignore them all – they strayed from the True Path, and now their only want is to bring others to join them.

Walk up to the desk and look under it. There will be a button, flashing rescue orange, labeled “In Case of Emergency”. Press it twice, then jam the stool the worker was sitting on underneath it – this button is all that holds the door open, and you do not want it to slam shut on you.

Get up and turn around. There will be a brushed-steel door labeled “The True Path” in front of you. It is the one truth in this place. Ignore all the others; only the True Path leads to the liar.

Go through the door. You may well be driven insane by your position: walking on the roof of a hallway that leads in an impossible direction, on its side, painted in an eye-jarring and impossible color. Ignore the visions – the only thing that is true is the path beneath your feet.

You can not shut your eyes at all here, lest you never manage to open them again. Endure the madness of your position, to say nothing of the sights that will come in a moment, and start walking. The hall’s ceiling is tiled in red and white. Keep your feet on the red tiles or you will fall through, straight into the madness beyond, and from then on you will only have one purpose: to bring others to join you.

Eventually, after what seems like an eternity, you will find yourself in front of a plain wooden door. Open it and walk in.

You will find yourself in a 30’s style office. A man in a black trench coat and a fedora hat is hunched over a pile of papers on the desk, muttering and scribbling. A gun sits on top of a paper-loaded bin labeled “In”. Pictures line the back wall, showing the man in a number of places, but you’ll notice some things common about all the photos: one, the man never shows his face; and two, everyone in the photos other than the man appears to be in unimaginable agony.

Edge your hand towards the gun, but touch nothing – this man does not enjoy being disturbed. Steel yourself, then ask into the air, “Where was He when they gathered last?”

Grab the gun quickly, then fire at the man until you run out of ammo. If you don’t, or if you miss, he will grab you and show you what his face really looks like. You do not want to see that – when you do, you will appear among the photos on the wall, and you will see why the others there were in agony.

However, if you succeeded, the man will slump over his desk in mid-lunge, dead. A single envelope will flutter to the floor. If you honestly want to know where He was, grab this envelope – the message inside will tell you. But the contents are extremely volatile, and you may find that your mind can not handle the knowledge. For, while the envelope will tell you where, it will not tell you why. This is more than most can handle.

Don’t try and read it now – you have no time. Drop the useless gun and run. Run as fast as you can manage, for without its guardian, the True Path is beginning to stray, and you do not want to be there when that happens.

When you see the steel door, lunge for it. If you were too slow, you will be trapped as a confused worker removes the stool, and you will be tortured endlessly until you agree to replace the man you killed. However, if you were fast enough, you will appear in the lobby, on one of the couches in the rest area.

Quickly, get up and run to the green armchair – the Object is calling, and there are others who want it as well. Throw the cushion off the seat.

You will have revealed a skeleton, twisted in a position of horrible agony. In his arms, he holds a book bound in navy blue and embossed with gold. The name is embedded in silver on the front – it’s a long one.

This book is Object 58 of 538.

59. Holder of Work

In any city, in any country, go to any construction site or foundry you can get yourself to. When you reach the overseer, ask to visit someone who calls himself “The Holder of Work”. The overseer will sneer and assault you with a barrage of hideous truths. Do not react and restate your request. He will ask you to wait for a second, as he has to call his boss; at least that’s what he says. He will then leave. Wait for a minute or two, then a person will walk beside you. He will ask you for “The Holder of Twins”. Tell him that the worker is currently away, talking to his boss. Tell him that both of you will have to wait until the warden returns.

In that very second, the worker will reappear, seemingly out of nowhere. He will ask you politely to wait here while the other person may follow him. Disobey the warden, for if you wait now, you shall never leave the spot you are standing at. Follow them, pretending that you simply have the same way as them.

After a short while, you will reach a paper door. Do not be fooled, this paper is stronger than any metal you have ever seen. The warden will now open the door, letting the other person in. Follow before the paper door closes again or wherever you are will turn into a house filled with all of your greatest fears, and you will be locked inside. Forever.

Should you have followed the other person into the door, both of you will find yourselves in a small paradise. Although you will find everything you like and love, do not touch anything with your hands and arms, for the beauty will then quickly fade away and madness will overcome your mind. Simply follow the path you will see below your feet and do not leave it.

The other person will do the same, and he will talk. He will tell you about many things that have happened in his life. Do not talk back; just listen. Neither he nor you want to see what will happen if he should ever stop walking on this path. For hours, you will walk and you will have to endure the talking. He will finally complain about having a sore throat and not having anything else to tell you.

You will then reach a golden door; it will open. The closer you are, the wider it opens. Enter the door and you will find yourself in an almost pitch-black room, lit by only two candles. One of them is beside a rucksack, the other beside a mirror. Walk to the rucksack and lift it, as heavy as it may be. Walk to the mirror; you will now choose your fate.

Should the other person already be standing there, you can quickly scream, “No matter how hard the work, it will be done!” and then smash the mirror if you want to obtain your piece of the puzzle. Should you have destroyed the reflecting item, the other person will scream inhumanly and slowly melt. After a minute, he will be gone, only his shoes being left. Take them and you will be returned to your home.

The shoes are Object 59 of 538. Don’t ever put them on.

60. Holder of Twins

In any city, in any country, go to any construction site or foundry you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask to visit someone who calls himself “The Holder of Twins”. A person will suddenly appear beside you and the worker will be gone. Ask the person the same thing, but the answer will be that the worker is currently away, talking to his boss. He will tell you that both of you will have to wait until the worker comes back.

In that very second, the worker will reappear, seemingly out of nowhere. He will politely ask the other person to wait while he tells you that you may follow him. Do that and ignore the other person disobeying the worker and be glad that he didn’t obey, or you would have walked into your death.

After a short while, you will reach a paper door. But do not let it fool you; this paper is stronger than any metal you have ever seen. The worker will now open the door, letting you in. The other person will quickly follow you. If he doesn’t, pray for a swift death.

Should he have followed, both of you will find yourselves in a small paradise. Although you will find everything you like and love in this place, do not touch anything with your hands and arms, for the beauty will then quickly fade away and madness will overcome your mind. Simply follow the path you see below your feet and never leave it.

The other person will do the same, and you will have to talk. Tell him about everything you can remember from your life and hope that he doesn’t talk back. Neither you nor he want to know what will happen if you ever stop walking while being on this path. For hours, you will walk and you will have to keep talking all the time. Finally, as you see something shiny at the horizon, you may complain about a sore throat and that you have nothing else to talk about.

You will reach a golden door. The closer you come, the wider it will open all by its own. Enter the door and you will find yourself in an almost pitch-black room lit by only two candles. One of them is beside a mirror, the other beside a rucksack. Walk to the mirror and stare into it, as horrifying as the pictures may be. You will notice the other person walking towards you; your fate will be decided in the next moments.

Should he scream, “No matter how hard the work, it will be done!” and then smash the mirror, then your fate is sealed. After he has destroyed the reflecting item, you will feel unbearable pain and you will scream, out of instinct. You will be melting in the next seconds. The other’s task will be fulfilled.

But, should he choose to do nothing, you may utter the question, “What reflects them?” You will now see the other person slowly melting and he will scream inhumanly. Endure the screams for about a minute, then he will be gone; only the rucksack he has worn will be left. Open it, take the mirror inside it and you will be returned to your home.

The reflection is Object 60 of 538.

61. Holder of Madness

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask to visit someone who calls himself “The Holder of Madness”. The worker will bow formally, with his hand tucked under his chest, and motion for you to follow into a waiting room. He will leave, and the lights will go out. When they return, thirteen seconds later, you will be in a dirty hallway with cuneiform scratching on the walls.

As you walk, the scratches will gradually change, to resemble an alien writing; attempting to decipher the writing will send you into writhing agony for the rest of your mortal days. As you reach a black orb, shimmering with liquidity, you must speak, “We are all mad, for you are the bringer.” If the Orb comes to resemble a doorway, enter. If the Orb begins to rotate, you will be dragged into the nether.

In the following chamber, made of twisting black coral, stands a figure, ever-changing. In him, her, it, you will see all men, all women, children, animals, creatures, beasts, horrors that exist. It will not recognize your presence, unless you extend your left hand and say, “I swear an oath to Koth; may the Tower ever stand.” At that time, he will cease his changing, long enough to place his hand on yours, and your soul will be torn out of your body and placed within a numbered humanoid skull resting on a pile to his left.

Touching that skull will bring you to the foyer of an ancient temple, lying in the sands of Mesopotamia.

The skull is Object 61 of 538.

62. Holder of Salvation

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask with no hesitation to visit someone who calls herself ‘The Holder of Salvation.’ The clerk will give a knowing smile and beckon for you to follow. You will be led outside to an old and run-down well with quite a few stones missing, and the clerk will give you a key before returning to his post.

If you should look into the well, you will find that an old, rusted ladder descends into its seemingly endless depths. Should you choose to climb down, you will hear the wind as it blows past you. It may sound to you like a heavenly dirge, or the hellish wails of the damned. There is no way of knowing which you will hear. Should the wind stop at any time, freeze, even if it leaves you hanging by one hand, for it means that an unspeakably hellish creature has entered the shaft. If you stay perfectly still, and are very lucky, you will feel the wind of its passing. However, if you should hear its bestial growl, you would be wise to let yourself fall, and hope that the bottom of the shaft reaches you before the creature does.

After the beast has passed, wait a good minute before continuing your descent. You will soon lose sight of the opening to the shaft. Don’t bother trying to light up the shaft, for this darkness swallows all light. After what will seem like an eternity, you will reach the bottom of the shaft, and remember the touch of light, as there is a single candle down here.

As you look around, you will see that you are in a small room, only slightly wider than the well shaft you just survived. There will be a single wooden door, nondescript and aging, across from where you landed. Don’t bother looking for the ladder, for it has disappeared. Approach the door and knock thrice, lightly. Should you hear nothing, pray for a swift death, for there is no escape from what awaits you now. However, if you should hear a woman’s voice say, ‘Come in, dear, I have been waiting for you,’ then open the door and slowly enter.

You will find yourself in a room no bigger than a closet. A beautiful young woman sits across from you, on what will appear to be an aged chest. She will only answer to one question: ‘If they are brought together, what can save us?’ She will then proceed to describe, in horrifying detail, the only way to stop them once they are united. Many give up hope in this room, but you must not let that happen. For if you do, the woman will reveal her true form, and your death will be both long and painful beyond mortal comprehension. If you should survive, the woman will let loose an unearthly wail and disappear, leaving only the chest. The key you were given earlier will open it.

What lies in that chest is Object 62 of 538.

63. Holder of Damnation

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask with no hesitation to visit someone who calls themselves “The Holder of Damnation.” The clerk will frightfully deny any knowledge of such a thing, but will covertly slip you a toothless key with an “¡” engraved upon it, and point you down a certain hallway. At the end of this hallway is a perfectly nondescript door, but for the doorknob. It is made of a stone that is blacker than the deadest night, and should you touch it, you will feel as if your very soul is being drained away.

Upon entering the door, you will be in a brightly lit hallway. The walls are lined with drawings, drawn in the style of a child, depicting the dreams of such a child. Do not look at these pictures, for their pleasant appearance is merely a facade, hiding their true nature. Should you gaze upon them, they will surely be the last thing you will ever see, for your eyes will be the first to go. The ceiling of this hallway drips blood. If you were to look up, and believe me, this is something you do not want to do, you would see the disemboweled corpses of hundreds, nay, thousands of children, impaled to the ceiling on their own bones.

Should you reach the end of the hallway, you will find a massive iron door. At eye level, there will be a small sliding plate. Take the key that was given to you earlier and hold the toothless part in your hand, with the “¡” uncovered and pointing directly at the plate. Close your eyes and give one sharp knock on the plate. You will hear it slide back. Resist any temptation to look, for it will be the end of you. Wait ten seconds; count them off carefully. If the key does not change, run. Run as fast as you can and only stop when your legs can go no farther. If you feel the key change, however, wait until you hear the plate slide back into place and open your eyes. In its place will be a massive padlock. Unlock it with your newly-changed key, and quickly enter the room, closing the door behind you. The Holder of Damnation despises the light.

You will be in a dark room. There is no light whatsoever, but you will hear labored breathing from the farthest corner. Do not move closer, and do not speak. The only words that will not result in your death are: “Who was the first to bring them together?” Should you ask, you will hear a voice, neither male nor female, speaking in your mind. Soon it will give up on speech, and the images it creates in your mind will be horrifying. Do not scream, whatever you do, for it will see this as a sign of weakness and end your existence in such a way that only the criminally insane could understand. If you weather its tale, you will notice that specks of light have appeared all throughout the room. A hiss will fill the room, and rise to the most horrific scream you will ever hear as each point of light explodes, lighting up the room. When the light dims, you will see the charred remains of the Holder in the corner. Do not move in for a closer look; dead snakes can still bite. At your feet you will find a small velvet bag. It contains a flawless crystal star.

That star is Object 63 of 538. If it is allowed to shine, its light will drive all that see it mad.

64. Holder of Nature

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get to. When you reach the front desk, cover your ears and ask the worker to see the one who calls himself “The Holder of Nature”. If you didn’t cover your ears, pray to any and every god you know for relief of what comes next. The worker will stand and begin yelling in an unknown language, in a voice more filled with evil than Satan or any of the demons in his legion. To hear this voice clearly would corrupt your mind instantly, leaving you to suffer a pain far greater than the fires of hell for the rest of your life. Even with your ears covered, your head will feel as if it were in flames whilst the worker speaks his evil tongues. When he is finished, wait ten seconds before uncovering your ears, for evil still lingers in the air. After ten seconds, uncover your ears, and put your hand to your forehead, saying, “In the beginning.” As you finish saying this, the worker will open his mouth and a portal will appear. Should you step through this portal fearfully, he will close it when you are only halfway through, trapping your soul in the dark abyss that connects the dimensions for all eternity.

If you make it through safely, though, you will find yourself in a garden. A garden more beautiful and lush than any forest or jungle known to man, demon, and angel. The garden seems to stretch on in to infinity, and in front of you, you will see a path. Follow it, but do not stray, for if you do the beasts of the garden will attack and begin to slowly tear the layers of your body off over what seems to be an eternity, and you’ll be conscious for all of it.

After what may seem anywhere from five minutes to five months of walking, you will come upon a quaint home. Knock on the front door, and if you should hear a voice saying, “You are not welcome here, stranger,” there is no hope for you. No praying will save you here. Your death will be horrible. If you hear a voice saying, “Please, come in,” you may open the door and go in. He has welcomed you.

Inside, you will see an old man in a rocking chair, reading by the fire. He will only respond to one question, “What started it all?” The man will begin to change his shape right in front of you. The wrinkles on his face and arms will begin to fade, and his muscles will begin to take shape, as if he were getting much younger. He will stand and ask you to come to him. Don’t. As much as he may tempt you to, do not. Stare directly into his eyes, and without breaking eye contact, inquire once more, “What started it all?”

Once you say this again, the fire will jump from the fireplace and surround the man. He will begin to speak, in a voice as loud as the roaring sea, yet as soft as a gentle breeze. He will explain the beginning of life, the Objects, and all of the universe. When he is finished, the fire will reside, and the man will be gone. In his place will be a marble on the floor. This marble is as red as fire, yet as blue as the sea. As clear as the wind, but as black as the earth. Do not try to comprehend this marble, for it will twist your mind into madness.

Pick up the marble and leave through the door you came through, and you will be back in the main lobby of the institution.

The marble is Object 64 of 538. You control the elements now.

65. Holder of Agony

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask to visit something which calls itself “The Holder of Agony”. The eyes of the person behind the counter will widen in surprise, as if they didn’t understand why they recognized the name. They’ll sputter for a moment, but their facial expression will soon change to a drawn, furrowed, pensive scowl. They will shudder, turn away, and refuse. You must ask again, and continue asking in a calm, soft voice, even if they weep or scream. Eventually, the life will leave their eyes, and they will lead you, with a shuffling gait, to a room with no apparent number just down the hall.

The worker will open the door for you. As you walk past to enter the dark room, they will land a sharp kick on the small of your back, hurtling you into the room. Whatever you do, do not stop or turn around while passing the worker. Please just trust me on that.

The room will smell simultaneously of alcohol sanitary wipes and the metallic tang of blood. You won’t be able to see much until the same door you entered through opens, and the gray light from without illuminates a lanky, cloaked figure entering the room. When the door shuts, it will be darker than before.

Immediately, you will feel the cloaked figure press itself against your body. Its bony limbs will jab your ribs and stomach as it says, “I know you”. Its voice will reverberate through your entire body, and you will feel every type of discomfort – like you’re being watched, being molested, like your foot fell asleep, like you’re dizzy, nauseous, impatient. Stand perfectly still. Make no sound, except to ask: “Why are they in pain?”

It will reply, in its gut-wrenching hiss, “I will hold you here for all time, and every night, I will mutilate you, rape you, and murder you.” You will have no time to brace yourself or think, and especially no time to move, before you feel a wicked, jagged blade thrust into your abdomen and come out the other side. You will feel its rough surface grating against your organs. Do not move. Do not speak. Do not scream.

The voice will continue. “I will murder everything you love, and make them see your face as their killer. I will ruin everything you find beautiful. I will twist your mind until you are as grotesque and perverted as the rest of us.” It will not stop, even as fiery, acidic pain lances through your nerves from the blade in your gut. The pain will stop your breath and perhaps your heart, but you must remain perfectly still. More of the blades will pierce your body, in soft places, in impossible places, and the voice will continue hissing its deadly vows, its baroque tortures that become so creatively inhuman and meticulously soulless that you will be in danger of losing your mind.

Stillness is your only defense. If you move, the blades, growing in number from one to five to thirty to a hundred or a thousand, if only you had a chance of counting, will tear away in every direction, forcing every chunk of your flesh and nerves to stay conscious and aware as they are rent apart again and again forever. Stay still, even as your entire body is wracked with agony that couldn’t possibly exist; you would be wishing for a reprieve of snake bites on your eyes and razor blades in your nerves.

You must listen to the voice carefully, for eventually, it will say one of two things.

If it says, “This glory is reserved for those who have proven themselves,” then I can offer only my condolences. Your eternal suffering will be so insanely horrible that anyone on Earth who has seen your face or heard your name will have nightmares of your agony even after they have passed on to the afterlife in Heaven or Hell. Your soul will be a wasted husk.

If it says, “Your whole existence of forever is untouched by this agony,” you must reply, quickly and confidently, “The agony fills us all until they have stopped hurting.” For every second it takes to muster your reply through the haze of unbelievable pain, you will suffer from another unique and unerring agony for the rest of your life. If you cannot speak, you will never know another moment without torture, and each day you will consider the prior day’s pain to be the tickle of a feather.

If you reply correctly, everything will stop – the pain, the hissing – and you will feel the figure, once pressed against you, crumbling into nothingness. Lift the cloak and you will find a leather pouch. Open it only if you want to know what it would be like for the world to be torn asunder by a plague that even Hell wouldn’t condone.

This tortured dust is Object 65 of 538.

66. Holder of Greed

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask to visit someone who calls himself “The Holder of Greed”. If a look of ravenous hunger comes over them, run from the institution, for if you do not, you will be eaten alive in the most painful way possible. However, if a look of tired want comes over them, they will take you to a cell in a corridor that wasn’t there before. The walls will be made of fine gold and silver, but do not touch it, lest They devour your soul.

As you walk, if at any time you hear the sound of coins jingling, stop and yell quickly, “All that glistens is not gold!” If it continues, you are damned for all eternity, and there is no point in running. However, if it stops, continue.

Eventually, you will come to a gilded door. The worker will open it, and close their eyes as you enter. As you enter, the door will close behind you. Inside is an exquisite palace, crafted of ivory and gold and wonders that no mortal man has ever built or conceived. Do not dwell too long, as if you do, the world will open under you, and you will be eternally trapped in a world of filth and squalor.

If you continue, the palace around you will slowly and increasingly drip blood, until a torrent of blood rains down on you. Continue, and never look back, and do not stop. Eventually, the blood will stop, and you will be in a room filled with gold bricks and treasure. Sitting in a throne of platinum will be a corpse, which will respond to only one question: “What do they lust for?”

It will stand up, and begin telling of every want, every desire, every theft. If you manage to keep your sanity, the corpse will motion towards the treasure when it finishes with its story. However, do not take any of the gold or treasure. Instead, look for a small, copper coin, inscribed with an unknown language. The second you touch it, you will be back in the institution, as if nothing had happened, with the coin in your hand.

That coin is Object 66 of 538.

67. Holder of the Cosmos

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. Get the front receptionist’s attention and ask to visit someone called “Holder of the Cosmos”. He will look you up and down. If he mutters and walks away, stay in place – he will return momentarily. Upon his arrival he will unlock a trapdoor beneath his desk and motion for you to follow. He will lead you down an ancient, creaking staircase made of wooden planks. It remains somehow suspended in an impossibly large room, the sides or bottom of which you will not be able to fathom. The only light will be from the quickly receding entryway. Vast, hulking shapes lumber in the darkness – I recommend that you do not make any noises louder than the gentle squeaking of the stairs.

Your guide will remain only a few steps ahead of you, but in the oppressive darkness his features remain unclear. You will be descending the stairs for what seems like an eternity. During this time, do not let your thoughts wander. Focus entirely on your objective – the Keeper of the Cosmos. As you sink farther into the blackness, wooden planks swaying beneath your feet, your guide’s form may seem to shift. It is not a trick of your eyes. If he stops at any time, throw yourself from the stairs immediately – an eternity of falling would be preferable to his torment.

However, should he continue to move, you will eventually begin to feel a wind pick up. Far below you, the tops of trees will become visible. Above your head, a vault of stars and clouds. To your sides, a vast and unimpeded horizon, save for one structure far to your right. As you descend further, you can see it is a mansion with a small dirt road leading from it. This part of the descent is incredibly peaceful and will last for several hours. Enjoy it, but do not under any circumstance look back from where you came. The rickety staircase will collapse and you will plummet to your death.

Eventually you will reach the bottom of the stairs. They will have deposited you in a thickly wooded forest, a few yards from a dirt road. Your guide will stop moving. In the sparse shafts of moonlight filtering down between the trees, you will notice that he has changed considerably. Where once stood a man now stands a hellish, hulking beast. He will begin to turn. You must run. The staircase you recently descended will have disappeared. Your only choice is the road. The demon is slow, but he will not relent.

Run. Run until your lungs burn and your chest heaves. Run until your throat is slick with blood. Until you cannot run any longer. Give up hope. Fall to your knees. Weep. You will feel the demon’s breath at your heels, and you will mumble a prayer into the dirt road as you see your life flash before your eyes. At that very moment, as you have lost all hope, a gunshot will roar into the void of the darkened forest road. The demon at your back will have been slain.

This next moment is crucial. No matter how winded you are, you must stand up and immediately say: “Who is their enemy?” If you wait a split second too long you will be blown to bits in a similar fashion to the demon. However, if you are fast enough, an elegantly dressed gentleman on a horse will trot out of the darkness a few steps down the road. He appears rather young and is holding an ornately crafted, 18th century pistol in his right hand. He has several large tomes strapped to the saddlebags of his horse and bits of script in a foreign language are visible pasted, in a fashionable way, to various bits of his clothing. He will slowly approach you, making no move to dismount, but visibly interested in your appearance. You must hold his gaze until he disappears in the opposite direction. Following this exchange your exhaustion will suddenly catch up with you, and you will find it increasingly difficult to stay awake. Give in to your weariness and sleep.

You will awake the next day in your bed, clutching a rough piece of paper. On it, in an elegant script, are written the words: “You are a fool.”

That man is the Holder of the Cosmos, and he still holds Object 67 of 538. He defends the cosmos from their revival. Now that he knows your intentions, he will do anything to stop you.

There is, however, an alternate option. You must already bear the Widowmaker for this to work. Instead, when you rise, ask the Holder not, “Who is their enemy?” but instead show him Object 186. If you do, his eyes will widen in surprise and he will dismount. In his hand will be the white, ornate 18th-century pistol he used moments previously to save you. It is the brother of Object 186. He will then ride into the distance, soon fading.

The Holder of Cosmos has relinquished the Gravebringer, Object 67 out of 538.

68. Holder of the Negative

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. Get the front receptionist’s attention and ask to visit someone called “Holder of the Negative”. If the receptionist adamantly refuses to help you, immediately turn, leave the institution behind and take the fastest possible route home. After a fortnight of hiding you will know whether their trackers have found you. However, if the receptionist merely nods at you with a stony expression and gestures for you to follow, do so. He will lead you to a seemingly innocent-looking hospital room and leave.

As soon as the door locks, push the bed aside to reveal a decrepit wooden trap door underneath. Use the bed to block the door – the clock is ticking and the sentinels are already on their way. Open the trap door to find a dusty and grimy gray metal coffin in a shallow pit dug into the floor. Open the locks on the side and lift the lid. If the coffin is empty, lay yourself inside and close both the trap door and the coffin lid. If there is somebody already in there, well – I would recommend trying to snap your own neck before the coffin’s previous resident does.

You must lie inside the coffin for exactly four minutes and thirteen seconds. Until this time, do not open the lid. What would come to pass if you did is beyond the description of mortal men. When the required time has passed, you may knock twice on the metal lid. If there is no answer, knock thrice more. If the coffin trembles slightly in response, you may push the lid off. If the coffin remains silent, you know your life expectancy is now a minute at best.

Push the lid aside to emerge in what seems like the dark, blasted remains of a bizarre underground machine shop. The blotched, ocher metal walls and the gray dust of time over the disengaged, quiet computing devices speak in their own way about the hundreds of thousands battles which were planned, organized and miserably lost in the very same room you are now sitting in. As alien and intricate the machinery may be, don’t dally. Rise to your feet and reach your right hand out to find a wall. Fumble around until you find a metal lever sticking out of it – it’s roughly at your shoulder level. If the room starts to emit an increasingly loud whirring, do not panic. Instead, call out sternly into the blackness: “It’s the last piece of knowledge we require.” If the whirring dies down, continue your search. If it doesn’t, the machinery will engage in their last integration routine with you as their target. When you find the switch, throw it.

The last operational generator will start up with a painful whine, powering little else but the few good light fixtures around the floor. In the core of the still dim room, you will see a huge, brass-colored and impossibly complex mechanical device which most closely resembles a crossover between an opulent metal throne and a Victorian-era life support system. Amidst the zigzagging tubes, pipes, valves, cogs and plates you can see a gaunt, inhumanly frail corpse barely clinging on to its life. As intimidating as the throne may be, enter the creature’s presence and matter-of-factly utter the query: “Who scattered them for the first time?”

Your question sparks a new light in his milky gray eyes, and with the spite and frustration of countless generations in his raspy, mechanically amplified voice he will recite to you all of the stories, all tales of vain heroism, every broken union and all of the heart-wrenchingly disappointing failures of all of those who came before you. His contagious despair will punch through your skin, slither past your flesh and pierce through your bones, but take heed not to lose your focus – he is still their slave and his corrupted side will readily consume you if given the opportunity. He will tell you of those who first knew of their convergence, how they scattered the objects and broke their unholy union and what made those first fail and perish.

When he is done, he will slowly and painfully extend his hand out to you from within the metal shell. Do not take his hand. Instead, cross your arms across your chest and exclaim: “Your flawed routines are not mine to embrace!’ Leaning against one of the mysterious devices is a thin, two-pronged metal staff. Grab it, and using all the power you can possibly muster, drive it through the only exposed vital part in his body – his head. His death will be swift.

When his rotten body and the infernal device lie silent, reach inside the metal shell protecting the body and fumble around the inner workings of the machine. As soon as your hand hits a part pulsing heat, yank it out. It should come off easily. Retreat as fast as you can back into the zinc coffin – you have killed the only entity which upheld the order of the place and it won’t be long until the room is going to unmake itself and crumble into the void. Slam down the lid, close your eyes, and if you are lucky, you will near-instantly drift off into sleep.

When you wake up, you will wake up in your own home, in your own bed, tightly hugging a warm chunk of metal to your chest. You would be wise to get rid of the coffin around you at earliest opportunity. It evokes awkward questions

This corrupted golden gear is the Object 68 of 538.

69. Holder of the Mind

In any town, in any country, go to any mental institution or rehabilitation clinic. Approach the front desk, and ask to see someone who calls themself “The Holder of the Mind.” There will form a look of reluctance on the employee’s face, which they will hold just long enough that it is barely visible. Then, you will be led down a hallway, ending at a flight of stairs. The attendant will leave you at this point.

Ascend the stairs. They will go on for what seems like miles. If your step falters at any time, or you take time to rest, even a moment of respite, your focus will quickly lose clarity until it fades away entirely. If your consciousness returns thereafter, you may find yourself at whatever place you call home, and the institution will have essentially vanished from existence. If this is the case, thank whatever entity you wish that the least likely outcome came to pass. If your consciousness does not return, then you are still fortunate you did not awaken to find yourself where your more ill-fated predecessors arrived.

When you at last reach the apex of the staircase, you will find yourself in a dilapidated hallway, appearing as some portion of a high-rise building. The wall to your left will have many doors. Do not open any of them under any circumstances, regardless of what sensations you feel urging you to do so. These feelings are scarcely more than base trickery. The doors restrain segments of your psyche mercifully shut away; to free them now is a grave mistake. The wall to your right is composed entirely of glass. Looking out this enormous window reveals whatever place you were born in, though entirely empty and devoid of life.

Walk the hallway. Its length is variable, so this may take even longer than your recent climb. At the opposite end, you will see a set of double doors. Unlike the many other doors in this hallway, you must open this one, though you may feel reluctance to do so. This is natural: your mind is still trying to protect you. Overcome this feeling, and step into the blackness within. Before long, a single spotlight will turn on from somewhere in the darkness above you, and all things within the spotlight will be made clear. Through its reflected light, you can see the surrounding area very slightly illuminated. It is best that you do not look too closely at the shifting images beyond the region of clarity.

The rings on the ground will indicate to you that you are in some kind of a circus tent, standing in the center ring. Across from you is a stout man with a flamboyant appearance, wearing a lustrous top hat that shades his eyes, blocking them from your view. Ask him, “What in me have They obscured?” Speak clearly, and more importantly, speak loudly. Speak as though you are addressing a crowd of thousands, or the ringmaster before you will have to remove you from the stage in a manner aimed to please the beings currently watching. Their sense of entertainment differs significantly from that of any human; hope that you do not find out how.

If you appeased the ringmaster, he will crack his whip. The sound will seem impossibly loud, and will be accompanied by a blinding flash of light. He will be gone, and in his place, two other people will have appeared. To your left stands the object of your hatred: whomever you have borne more resentment towards than any other you have known. To your right, the one most dear to you. Living or dead, these people will appear in the flesh in front of you.

Approach your mortal enemy, and wordlessly, he will hand you a knife. You will feel a strong compulsion to drive it into his chest – you must resist this urge at all costs. Instead, you must use it to carve the heart from your loved one. They will be conscious throughout, and will scream relentlessly for you to stop, crying out to understand why. Do not listen, and do not hesitate in your task, for the audience wishes to see the weak shed blood, and you do not wish to prove you are a valid candidate.

Retrieve the heart, and pass it to the ringmaster who now stands behind you. He will then tell you in great detail your first thought that compelled you to take up your present journey, and all context surrounding it. For some, this once-obscured knowledge replacing a false construction of the mind can drive them to such desperation as to plunge the knife into their own chest. If you resist this temptation, your vision will blacken, and you will regain consciousness in whatever place you were born. The knife you used will lie next to you. It will be a coarse red, forever stained with the blood of all lives you have caused to end.

The knife is Object 69 of 538.

70. Holder of the Map

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask to visit someone who calls himself “The Holder of the Map”. The man or woman will not look up from their reading materials; memorize the page number. Repeat yourself firmly. The man or woman will look up, annoyed. They will make a snide comment. If you hear, “Another moron”, you will have found the right place. If there is any other comment, he will lie to you.

The man will then start by giving you directions. You will not be able to write them down, no matter how hard you try. If you don’t follow the directions exactly, you will get lost. You will find yourself outside the institution; this will be the worst fate you could imagine. If you follow the directions, you should hear a sound as if an infinite number of hands are writing. This sound will increase as you near your goal. Should this ever stop, breathe deep and yell any information you have about where you started at, including your directions on how to get there. The writing should start up again. If it didn’t, you will have to go back to where you began and start again. Don’t get lost.

At the end of the directions you should see a door with an electronic lock, the numbers stained with blood. Stop immediately and you will hear a giggle. Don’t turn around. A voice will start speaking under the now deafening sound of quills on paper. Ignore it and whisper one question: “Where will I end up?” He will go into grotesque detail about an ancient battlefield. At the point when he stops talking, input the number of the page the receptionist was reading from. You will wake up in the nearest church to the institution. You will be lying on a map.

The Map is Object 70 of 538. It will guide you anywhere you need to go, but not to the location of the other pieces.

71. Holder of the Sky

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask to visit someone who calls himself “The Holder of the Sky”. The receptionist will ignore your existence completely, and you will collapse on the floor. You will wake up in a torrent of soundless rain, the silence will be unbearable, and there will be no environment; what you walk on is solid air in a tempest.

In the silence a huge mass of people dressed in complete darkness will appear and begin approaching you; do not fear. Take off your shirt and wrap it around your dominant hand and walk towards them. Do not speak. When you get close hold your arm forward and simply fend aside anyone who is in your way; should your skin come into contact with any of them, the silence will be broken and you will become visible to them, and that would mean the end.

Going through, you will see a man in scarlet; he will be the only one standing still, and the only one that can see you. An empty circle will oddly form with you and the man inside, the rest continuously walking. Stand and wait; once the man raises his hand you must immediately break the silence: ‘How many will perish when they are brought together?’

The men will all stop and rhythmically face towards you, all of them eyeing your every move. Once they are all facing you, you must then ask, “And how many will be there to fight back?”

They will laugh. All but the one in the red cloak will laugh. Their cackling will resonate throughout the space you stand on, but you mustn’t give in. Resume asking, “And how many will be there to fight back?” Their laughter will grow and they will begin to fade. Once all but one are no more, ask one last question to the scarlet man: “Where will we be safe from them?”

The man will bow before you and fade; the only thing left will be his scarlet red cloak.

This cloak is Object 71 of 538.

72. Holder of Sanity

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask to visit someone who calls himself “The Holder of Sanity”. The receptionist will look at you strangely, but you must repeat the same question, and nothing else. Eventually, she will call for a “doctor” and you will be taken to the room in the furthest corner of the institution. Beware, for after this point there is no turning back, and if you wish to leave then, tell the doctor that you are sorry and must not have taken your medication today, and leave. Run as far away as you can, outside of the city limits, outside of the country limits, for cowards are not spared if caught. If you continue on, you will be put into a straitjacket and locked in a padded room.

After a few days that will seem like months, you will start to hear voices. Hundreds of them, all talking about how their lives were ruined. Their stories may drive you mad, and you would have to stay there for all eternity, for in your padded room, there is no death, only torture. If the voices stop talking, close your eyes tight, and shout at the top of your lungs, “I will not share your stories.” If the voices do not resume, pray that the pain you will next feel will not be so bad, however unlikely that is. If the voices continue talking, single out the voice that speaks of the very hospital you are in, listen to his story, and open your eyes. You will not be in the cell anymore, but still in a straitjacket. Instead, you will be in what seems like an endless void, the only thing separating you from the void a glass box.

A man will appear in front of you and ask if you have any questions. He will respond to one, and only one, question. Ask, “What drove them to insanity?” He will explain in horrifying detail about the lives and deaths of them. During his response, a large black dot will appear to be moving through the void, but you must not focus your sight on it, for it will shatter the glass box, leaving you to fall into the void for all eternity.

Once the man has finished his story, he will remove your straitjacket and bid you farewell. You will find yourself standing outside the institution, holding the straitjacket.

The jacket is Object 72 of 538.

73. The Holder of Triumph

In any city, in any country, enter any library you find. Ask the librarian at the front desk to see the Holder of Triumph. She will raise an eyebrow as if judging you but nonetheless will take you deeper into the library.

You will see a door in the southeast wing of the building that you could swear would lead you outside. The librarian will stop at said door and knock three times. A voice that sounds similar to two sheets of sandpaper rubbing together will ask, “Confident are thee, that triumph awaits at the end?” You must answer “Indeed, for I do not fail.” Say this before the librarian answers that you are a failure. If she does this, your very soul will be crushed under the weight of your own failure and she will feast on your flesh while you weep in your loss.

If you answer in time (and confidently enough), the librarian will hiss and produce a dagger. DO NOT ATTACK HER, for her strength and speed are beyond legend. She will hand the blade off to you and open the door, whispering curses as you pass.

The path is well lit, with no end in sight. Mirrors line the path reflecting every victory, good and evil, since before time began. To look into any of these mirrors is to fail in the scenario it reflects.

The path stretches beyond time, and you must follow. After what seems like an eternity of walking, a large steel door will appear. A voice will beckon you closer. Keep your mind free of doubt. You must be sure of your triumph, lest you have your soul rent from you and tortured for eternity.

Step up to the door and knock seven times. If the voice brands you a failure, the horror you will see will force you to slice your own throat open with the dagger. If there is no answer, then enter.

The room will be dark. The inky darkness will be almost tangible. Ask your question: “What will happen when he triumphs?” The room will light up, revealing a naked figure of great height, with the physique of Adonis, every feature gleaming in perfection save for the fact that he has no face. He will rise and turn toward you.

Ask again, “What will happen when He triumphs?”

The figure will cock his head sharply to the right and immediately lunge at you. DO NOT FLINCH, or he will beat you to death and feed off of your sanity. Instead, charge. But I warn you to attack with berserk ferocity or you will surely lose.

You must not kill him, only incapacitate him. He will speak directly into your mind: “Your perseverance serves.” Do not thank him, instead yell, “THRICE I SAY AND DONE! WHAT WILL HAPPEN WHEN HE TRIUMPHS?” The figure will scream now, the sound threatening to implode your mind, and he will describe in gruesome detail the end of time, when He arrives. Stab the figure in the throat and remove his head. His head will serve as your trophy, a symbol of your triumph.

This trophy is Object 73 of 538.

74. Holder of the Mark

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask to visit someone who calls himself “The Holder of the Mark.” The receptionist will freeze, as though he has known this moment was coming for a long time and is afraid it has finally arrived. He will stutter and tell you there is no such man here, but be insistent. He will eventually yield and after looking around to see if anyone else is here, he will beckon for you to follow him.

He will lead you along corridors of increasingly smaller size, until you eventually have to stoop. He will point you to a door at the end of a corridor so small you have to crawl to get to the end. It will be perfectly normal except for a large exclamation mark in the centre and a smaller question mark on the doorknob. This is your last chance to turn away, and if you have the slightest hint of doubt in you I recommend you do so. If your will is strong, open the door gently and pull yourself through.

You will emerge in an ornate hall, covered with wall paintings depicting famous historical dictators and murderers, butchers, rapists and serial killers. Do not linger on them, for the souls of the people reside in those pictures and the twisted hate of their life has been amplified in their death, waiting to reach out and rend you limb from limb, delighting in your slow and painful death.

When you finally reach the end of the hall, there will be a small wooden box with an insignia on it that is old and faded. You will feel a sharp tingle go up your spine as you behold this item and then a voice behind you will say: “Beautiful, is it not?” You must reply: “As the full moon.” If he is not satisfied with your response, pray he doesn’t make you one of his paintings and instead gives you a painless death. But if he is satisfied, he will say: “You ask?” You must say exactly: “How do we destroy them?” He will laugh and say he doesn’t know, but then will simply state, “You’re bound to think of something.” You will then wake up in the nearest bathroom, your eye in excruciating pain. As the pain recedes, you will see that your pupil has now taken the shape of the mark on the box back in that room.

That mark is Object 74 of 538. It will allow you to behold the ultimate truth.

75. Holder of Chance

In any city, in any country, seek out any school or educational facility you can find. When you reach the front desk, ask to see a person who calls himself “The Holder of Chance.” If the secretary shows any sign of fear, give the request again, and do not relent. Eventually your perseverance will pay off, and you will be led to a deserted classroom in a closed-down wing of the school. Scraps of police tape and faded chalk profiles will litter the floor, and the door will be sealed behind you before you can inquire anything. At this point you must choose one of the thirty desks, sit down and wait. Only one of these desks will allow you to keep your life; advising you to choose wisely would do little good, as there is no way to tell if you have done so until it is too late. After a short wait you should begin to hear things – children laughing, droning lectures, and the occasional snore – but these are merely echoes of a time when the classroom was host to nothing more devious than homework and pop quizzes.

As you wait, the sounds will slowly change. Where there was once laughter and lectures, there will now be screams of agony and howls of despair. Shades of the classroom’s horrible history will begin to take shape around you. Do not fear the shades, as they are harmless. The beast they can coalesce into, however, is not. As your wait continues, the shadows will grow more numerous and the classroom’s history will unfold in increasingly gruesome detail. This part has driven many men into fits of tears and more still into madness. Should you reach the end of this macabre production with your sanity intact, you will find out if you have chosen wisely. If you have chosen incorrectly, the shades will take form. They are hideous mockeries of what they were in life, half-formed doppelgangers of those long dead. There is no escape from this room now. They will tear you apart ever so slowly, taking twisted delight in inflicting the pain they have suffered on someone else. It will take you days, perhaps even weeks, to die. The only consolation you will have is that you will likely lose your sanity after the first few hours.

If you were lucky and chose the one correct desk, the shades will gather around you, coalescing into a pitch black mass. When it disappears, you will find yourself in the most lavish casino imaginable. It is populated by those who have played the games so long that their flesh has long since rotted away (for death is forbidden from entering this casino) and yet still play, hoping to gain their freedom. The casino has but two exits. One leads to a wasteland where fell beasts roam, and nothing but certain death awaits. The cost to pass through is four silver coins. The other door will take you to what you seek, and is the only chance for you to leave with your life. The cost to pass through is five gold coins. You will be holding a single silver coin in your hand. Don’t fret; as long as you are in this casino, you can never have any less than this one coin. A nearby sign will tell you that three silvers equal one gold. You must play if you do not wish to be trapped here for good, but remember the old casino boss’s idiom: “You can’t beat the house.”

Nearly every game is rigged in favor of the house and the precious few which aren’t change at random, serving only to trick and confuse you. The odds are most definitely not in your favor. If you do begin to win, take care to keep your fortune as secret as possible, as the damned around you have not been so lucky. Bear in mind that you cannot die in this place and that boastfulness may inspire them to turn on you in a fit of jealous hatred, ripping great chunks of flesh out of your body until their jealousy is quenched and their bloodlust sated.

If, against all odds, you manage to gather the five gold coins and enter the door unmolested by the other gamblers, you will find yourself in an elevator. It will take you up to an office even more opulent than the casino below. Behind a desk at the far end of the room will sit a skeletal figure, dressed in the finest suit you will ever see. Approach the desk and stand before it, asking only one question: “Will you roll?” It will nod and produce a pair of dice from its jacket. Call the roll, evens or odds. If you lose, the skeleton will grin, and you will take its place, waiting thousands of years for the next Seeker to be so lucky as to reach your new abode. If you should win, however, it will let loose a wail that will unbind the magics that hold the place together. Death will finally enter the casino below, granting the wretched gamblers the rest that has for so long been denied them. As the casino disintegrates around you, stand perfectly still. Hopefully you will not be taken with it, but if you are, there is no being in this world who can say what will happen to you. If you were not taken, you will reappear in the classroom. It will be exactly the same as you left it save a mound of dust and rotting cloth at your feet. Within it you fill find a pair of dice. As soon as you touch them, the door will unlock.

That pair of dice is Object 75 of 538. With every roll, they take another life.

76. Holder of Fate

In any city, in any country, seek out any school or educational facility you can find. When you reach the front desk, ask to see a man who calls himself ‘The Holder of Fate.’ Halfway through your question, the secretary’s face will light up with recognition, and she will produce an ornately decorated box. Opening it will yield you nothing but a bemused smile from the secretary, as it will be empty. After a moment, she will draw your attention back to her and lead you into the principal’s office. After a few muttered words between the two, the principal will welcome you with a handshake, and proceed to open a trapdoor concealed under his desk. He will hand you a dagger and offer a few grim words of luck before lowering you into the hole and closing the door. For a moment, you will be in total darkness, but images will soon emerge in front of you. You will recognize them as moments from your own life, and as you watch, you may come to realize that they are all connected. Every moment of your life has culminated in this very moment, and it is only with this realization that proceeding forward will become possible. But worry not, for this is a timeless place.

When you have accepted your fate, a door will appear in front of you. Through it is a single room with a closed door at the far end, blocked off from you by a gate. Once you are clear of the door you entered from, it will slam shut, and a person will materialize in front of you. Confused, they may prompt you for an explanation, but regardless of your answer, a fight will inevitably begin. If, at any time during the fight, should your opponent’s stomach be revealed, you will see that your own name is inscribed there. What this means, however, cannot be told. This battle will be one of the few moments of your life that is not scripted, and you will be well aware of the fact, as even moving your body will feel far more difficult than usual. Fortunately, the same holds true for your foe. Should you win the battle, the door at the far end of the room will open, and the gate will disappear. Fate will have lost its hold on you by this point, and what will happen to you beyond that door is beyond the knowledge of any being, but you can be certain that the chances of surviving without fate on your side are questionable at best. What is known, however, is that if you are an extremely lucky soul, you will eventually come to an ancient, rotting door. The doorknob will be lying on the ground before it, having long since rusted over and fallen from its place. One solid push is all it will take to open this door, and a cloud of dust will rise from the ground where it falls.

After the dust clears and you enter the room, you will be in an earthen cave. A small window, if it can be called that, will provide enough light for you to see three figures in the center of the room. The figures on the left and right, you will see as you draw closer, have been dead for many years. A stone is lodged in the skull of one, and the head of the second hangs at an awkward angle, its neck clearly broken. The figure in the center, however, still lives, despite its appearance, which clearly indicates that this being should have died centuries ago. The old crone, for that is what the center figure is, has only one eye. No ordinary eye, mind you, as it seems to shine with an otherworldly brilliance. Ask her this, and only this, lest she end your life in a manner so horrible that your worst fears would seem a blessing in comparison: “What do you see?” She will answer at her own pace, and impatience on your part will bring the full force of her considerable wrath upon you. When she finally speaks, it will be in a tortured voice. She will tell you that she sees everything, but that she had lost sight of you as soon as your earlier battle started. Deciding that you are too great of a threat, she will attack you, with speed and strength seemingly impossible for her decrepit body to possess. You must act quickly, as one hit from her will destroy you utterly. Take the box you received earlier and open it. Be warned, though; the contents of that once empty box are not fit for human eyes, and if yours happen to be open when they emerge, your existence will end in a most terrifying manner. Once the box is opened, you will hear unearthly sounds. When they cease, close the box and open your eyes, but not a moment before. Looking around, nothing will have changed but for the crone. Time has caught up with her, as she will now be as dead as the other two figures in this room. Her eye is nowhere to be seen.

You now have two choices. Opening the box a second time will reveal an object that will grant you the power to control the past, present and future of the world, save for the room you reside in, and the ones you passed through after your battle. However, should you do this, you will be trapped in this room for all eternity, with no conceivable escape. Your second choice is to leave the room and brave whatever horrors you faced in order to get there. In either case, fate will no longer have any control over your life. Not long after, you will discover what a sickening burden it truly is to control your own destiny.

The Object that now lies within the box is number 76 of 538.

77. Holder of Divinity

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. When you get to the front desk, ask to visit “The Holder of Divinity”. Repeat this two more times before the worker responds. He should stiffen, looking straight upwards for a few seconds before looking back down at you with eyes of an indescribable color. You must then follow the worker, keeping your eyes on the ground, tracing his footsteps as exactly as you can. If you do not follow precisely, you will never find your way again.

When the worker stops, turn around and look up from the ground. Resist any urge to look behind you from this point on. You will find yourself facing a door, with a hideously shaped red dagger stabbed into the center. Grip its handle, and an incredible pain should slowly creep up the surface of your arm, then across your whole body, sinking deeper and deeper into your body. If at any time you release your hold on the dagger, the pain will never go away, even after you die. Once the pain reaches your heart, you should feel a sudden surge of demonic strength. Rip the dagger from the door and it will swing open, the pain vanishing as the dagger separates from the door.

You must run through the doorway and through a long, arched hallway, which will open into a strangely lit circular room. Go straight for the man in the center. He will be kneeling, facing away from you, deep in prayer, completely in shadow but surrounded by a golden glow. If he finishes his prayer before you reach him, your eternal soul won’t be worth a plugged nickel.

Once you reach him, press the dagger to his throat and ask the question, “What do they teach?” He will begin to sing in answer. Do not try to comprehend his words; in your state they would destroy you. Listen only for the word “sacrifice”. As soon as you hear this word, stab the dagger into his throat. His blood will seep onto the dagger, transforming it, and light will fill the room. You will find yourself standing on the roof of the building you started at, holding a pure-white feather.

That feather is Object 77 of 538.

78. Holder of the Rails

In any city, in any country, go to any subway station you can get yourself to. This Holder will test your patience, and impatience will get you massacred. Once there, go to the closest officer to you and ask to see the “The Holder of the Rails”. Should a look of doubt and fear come over the officer’s face, you are in the right place, but if a look of greed and lust come over the officer’s face, run out of the station and keep running. You will hear an inhuman sound behind you, like the sound of a rabid dog chasing you, but do not look back, for if you do, the now distorted and gruesome face of the pit fiend the officer has become will send paralyzing fear through your body and you will be caught, raped, and fed upon for the rest of eternity, feeling everything as freshly as the moment it started. Keep running until that sound disappears or until the very act of inhaling feels like it will shred your lungs like so much cheap tissue paper. You will mercifully pass out. When you awaken, the officer will be gone and a new one will be in that officer’s place at the station.

If you were in the right place, however, the officer will take you to an elevator. Before the doors open, close your eyes. When you hear a bell, wait 5 seconds, then take 3 steps in. Make a 180 degree spin, and keep your eyes closed. The officer will get on with you and press a button. You will never know what floor you will end up on, so don’t fret. The same thing will happen over and over. You will be riding on the elevator for hours, going straight down. You will hear a bell and the doors will open. The officer will say, “Is this where you want to go?” Do not answer, do not open your eyes. After a while, the officer will sigh and the doors will close. You will go down another floor and a buzz will ring out instead of the bell. The officer will say, “End of the line.” Take 7 steps out and wait 30 seconds before opening your eyes. You will be in a long, dark hallway with old white, filth-caked walls. Blood will be oozing upward on the walls. Pay it no heed and walk. Walk swiftly, but don’t speed walk or run. The demons hiding in the shadows love fast prey, and your scent will slowly drive them wild with hunger.

When you get to the end, there will be a door with no knob. Push it open and you will be standing at the top of an escalator. It seems to go down into endless darkness, but don’t let your mind waver and don’t let your bravery falter. You’ve made it this far; there is no turning back. Should you hear a voice urge you to come down, ride the escalator all the way down. It will take you 7 days. If you hear a scream come from behind you, walk down the escalator at a normal walking speed. Count the first 20 steps in an indoor voice. Once you say ’20’, stop counting, but don’t stop walking. You will hear loud footsteps behind you, matching your footsteps, sometimes a bit slower, sometimes a bit faster. Do not slow down, do not speed up, do not look behind you, and do not speak. The footsteps will sound like hard sandals hitting metal and you will become very annoyed. Still, keep your pace and do not falter.

After about 20 minutes of walking, you will reach the platform. The footsteps will end and you will feel a presence right behind you. Turn around to face your follower. If it is a female apparition with a scarf on her head, you are safe for now. If it is a male apparition that stands at least 2 feet taller than you, throw yourself onto the tracks and the train will come instantly and end your life on the spot, which is a fate far more welcoming than what he would intend.

The female will smile at you and lean up to kiss you. Let her. She will thank you for accompanying her down the long escalator ride. At that time, ask her, “Where do I go?” She will gasp and move away and beg you not to continue. She will confess her love for you and wrap her arms around you. Ask her again, with sternness in your voice. “Where do I go?” If she pulls back and pushes you onto the track, pray that the train comes and takes your life before the woman calls forth her small demons. As small as they may be, they will enter your body and eat you from the inside out.

Should she pull away and cry, caress her cheek and tell her you love her softly. She will begin to tell you in a riddle like manner where the last and strongest Holder is. Ask her this, “How will I know when it happens?” When she opens her mouth to answer, the train will come, blowing its horn and awakening all of the demons from your worst nightmares. They will begin stampeding down the escalator, rage flaring in their monstrous eyes. Run as fast as you can to the front car of the train. Those doors will be the only doors that open, and they’ll open for anyone. The apparition is in the driver’s seat, looking at you with sadness in her eyes. Don’t stare into her eyes, for they will enchant you and cause you to forget your mission. The demons will rip you apart slowly and each day, you will heal just for it to happen again.

Reach over the apparition and press the only button. It will make the train move and seal all the doors. Now, it is safe to look at the apparition. Ask her the question again, “How will I know when it happens?” She will begin to blink in and out of existence and finally fade away, smiling. Her spirit is now free. Now, however, the station around you will begin to crumble and the train is speeding out of control. The lights will turn red and a gruesome demonic voice will answer you.

“When the sun shines at night,
And the moon lights up the day,
When the Devil runs to Heaven,
And God hides away,
When the plagues return at once,
And all of the first born sons die,
When thunder flashes and lightning rains,
And the Earth becomes the sky,
When fire cools and water burns,
When clouds surround and the mountains churn,
When screams are silent and silence becomes sound,
When angels fall from the melting ground,
The Legion will arise.”

The voice will speak slowly and you must run to the very last car into the control room and pull what looks like a jewel studded lever down. Once you pull it down, pull it out of the panel and you will see it’s a dagger. Where the button was in the first control room there will be a heart. Stab the heart and close your eyes. Scream out as loud as you can, “I fight for the souls that were lost in this trial! This motion is for them!” Drag the dagger down the heart and a loud screech will be heard.

Your eyes will open and you will be arriving at the station closest to your home. You will be sitting in a random seat with the dagger in your lap. Since it’s illegal to carry weapons on a train, you may want to conceal it as you leave. There will be a red taxi with wings on the door and a horn on the hood. Go to it, put your hand on the handle of the door and close your eyes. Get in, don’t speak, don’t open your eyes. Count to 10 in your head and open your eyes. You will be on your couch at home. If you look on your nightstand, you will see a picture of yourself and that apparition while she was alive. You two will be in a playful embrace and suddenly, sadness will wash over you. You will suddenly think you have just lost the love of your life, the love you never had. Look at the dagger.

That dagger is Object 78 of 538.

79. Holder of the Flesh

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house in you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, look around carefully. Look for any workers eating a meal. Look for the one who appears to be full or at least almost done, for asking one who has not eaten may result in you being eaten for lunch. Ask that worker to see “The Holder of the Flesh”. In a muffled voice full of food, the worker will point you to a dead cow in the middle of the room that wasn’t there before. The cow will be belly up, with a large open gash from neck to crotch. The worker will gesture for you to go inside it.

As you crawl into the dead cow, you will slip inside a tight, fleshy tube, the muscular reflexes beyond the slimy film forcing you along the way. Try to stay in one position, as too much movement may cause you to be ejected from the tube rather violently into a large toothy maw, which will chew on your body until you are nothing but pulp. If you’ve exited the correct end, you will fall to the floor of an ornate cathedral of bone, flesh and organs. Eyes of many sizes peer at you from many spots. In the back, the floor arches a bit up and down, the wide rib cage holding back massive lungs and a large heart. Inserted into the back wall is a huge glass jar, suspending a gigantic, pulsating brain in fluids. Its long, thick nerves hang like spider webs all around, stretching to the walls beside it and to the ceiling far above.

Without warning, two very large and very long muscular, skinless arms with clawed fingertips emerge from the walls. Both arms will grab you whether you attempt to flee or not. You cannot escape their grasp. The brain will not respond to anything you say or do, except for one question. If you do not or cannot ask your question, you will be torn piece by piece, forced to stay alive and feel every moment of pain, while being reassembled into the fabric of the living cathedral. Never quite dead but never quite alive, unable to scream though you want to badly, you will live as one with the living cathedral for all time. The question you must ask before suffering this cruel fate is, “Why do they despise life?”

Without pause, the brain will then open your skull, painlessly. With but a tiny pinch of itself, it will insert a pinch of itself into yours. You will then realize, in the most thorough detail, every bit and piece of what makes life, life. All of mankind’s knowledge, achievements and progress will be rendered completely and utterly useless compared to this. This has driven many quite mad and if you too cannot handle it, you shall share their fate, clawing apart your own brain and scattering your thoughts throughout the cosmos, never to reassemble again. But you must stay focused and calm, for this information is quite possibly the most tightly held secret in all of the known and unknown universes and should never be shared with anyone but a true god, lest you invoke man’s early demise.

If you yet still hold resolve, the brain will let you go. Do not dally, as the brain is always tempted to add more flesh to his own. Escape through the way you came in, and as you slide along, you will stop at a dry dead end. You will find yourself under the covers of your own bed, backwards, with your feet on your pillows.

That piece of knowledge is Object 79 of 538.

80. Holder of Extravagance

In any city, in any country, go to any sizable school or university you can find. After locating the front desk, walk up to it and ask to see the one known as “The Holder of Extravagance”. The attendant will look unfazed, even slightly bored, as though this question has grown so common as to become routine. Tiredly, they will rise and lead you through the halls of the building. You will see many dozens of unboundedly fascinating and eye-catching objects, but do not once stop or slow to examine any of them in closer detail, or the group of supposed students who have been following you will take the opportunity to pounce, and you will never see the outside of the walls again. Instead, stay focused on following the attendant.

Eventually, he will lead you to a door and gesture for you to enter. Do so, and it will shut rather gently behind you. That click you heard was the lock. Don’t try to open it – the students mentioned earlier are waiting outside the door should you succeed.

You find yourself in a history classroom, but it’s more boring than any other classroom you’ve ever seen. There are no posters on the gray walls, the shelves are devoid of books, and the desks are bare and minimal. A teacher sits at the front desk, wearing a bland gray outfit, grading papers. The combined effect makes you want to drop off to sleep, but be warned – if you do, the nightmare that you enter will never end. Also, do not interrupt the teacher at her work- she feels overworked for her pay already, and if you bother her she may well snap.

Instead, steel yourself and sit down. Third row from the door, second desk back. Sitting any other place will lead to your demise in the events to follow. A scuffle will be heard outside the door, but do not turn to look in that direction – none of the students wish to be noticed as they walk in, and all of them are already late. Merely keep your gaze directed forward.

Somehow, they all manage to sit down without the teacher noticing, and the lesson begins. It is almost painful in its execution – bare-bones, no-frills teaching. A notebook and pencil have appeared on your desk – quickly begin taking notes, lest the teacher notice and fail you. And you don’t want to fail this class, believe me. The facts are so stripped-down they hurt, but never once should you halt or interrupt.

After a while, a test will be announced. Accept it. It appears to be written in a language from another planet, and about places and people you don’t think have ever existed. Keep calm, write from your notes for the first few questions. When you reach question four, lightly tap the kid in front of you on the shoulder. Quietly – you don’t want the teacher to catch you – ask him, “When was it meant to happen?”

The kid will glance nervously at the teacher, then scribble madly on a piece of paper and pass it back to you. Read it quickly and memorize what it says – the location it details is where the Object is hiding. But the moment you take your eyes off the paper or attempt to move, the teacher will catch you, and all hell will break loose.

The room will suddenly be clothed in the heaviest opulence you have ever seen, and the students and teacher will be revealed in their true forms. These bar description, but know this – they have all the same strengths and weaknesses of the normal human. All across the school, the illusion has been broken, and you’re going to have to reach the object – wherever it is – before the students manage to take you down.

The gauntlet’s off now. Use whatever methods available to reach the object – violence, murder, deception, nothing is barred and nothing is sacred. There will be no repercussions, but if there were, they’d in no way be worse than what will happen should the students bear you to the floor. Make your way to the location, and the Object will be glaringly obvious among the opulence – a plain brown paper package tied with twine, about the size of a large soup can. A thin paper envelope is tied under the string. Grab it, then locate the nearest bathroom. Battle your way into it, then slam the door. It will lock, and hold, but not for long.

Quickly, slip the envelope from the parcel and throw it into the second stall – it doesn’t matter where it lands as long as it’s in the walls. The envelope is what draws them, so you want to stall as much as possible. Turn on the hot water in two of the sinks and the cold in the other one. Then, with the door pounding so loud it drills through your head, face the hand-dryers. There’s three. Take a deep breath, then slam the button on whichever one you like.

Everything will black out for a bit. If you pressed the wrong button, the blackness will lift only for you to experience what the students are about to do to you. It’s never the same, but it’s always unbearably painful, and you won’t stay sane long enough to witness your demise. If you pressed the correct button, however, you will wake up sprawled on the floor of a bus stop half a mile down the road from the limits of the second-largest city you’ve ever visited. Sit up, rub your eyes. You’re alone here, and for the moment, safe. Unwrap the package – there’s a surprising number of layers on it.

Keep unwrapping until you find a layer of green wrapping paper. Stop at this point and look to your left – a cheap lighter is sitting on the bench, along with sufficient bus fare into the city. Grab both, pocket the money, and pile the brown paper and string up. Burn the pile- that last layer of wrapping was there solely to protect the Object from the brown wrapping, and you don’t want it in existence when you open it finally.

When the pile is nothing but ash, unwrap the final layer and toss it away. You now hold a strange gold-colored D cell battery. Get up quickly – the bus is coming, and you don’t want to look like a total weirdo by sitting on the floor of the stop rather than the bench.

The battery is Object 80 of 538.

81. Holder of Simplicity

In any city, in any country, go to any sizable school or university you can find. When you reach the front desk, ask to see “The Holder of Simplicity”. Should the worker utter a single, piercing shriek, place her hands on her ears and close her eyes, you have come to the right place and should feel free to ask again. But, if she simply ignores you and writes something down, your life is doomed; you will instantly become completely aware of everything that has to happen for each action you make to occur, from stepping on an ant to blinking. After you ask the second time, the worker should instantly calm down and ask you to follow her.

She will lead you on a roundabout path, heading through the seemingly endless halls of the school. Count the number of right turns you make- after seven right turns, casually slip into the shadows and let the worker continue walking. Should you fail to do this, you will never get another chance to leave, and those endless halls will swallow you up forever.

If you succeeded in losing the worker, stick your hands in your pockets and look around for a bulletin board. There will be a morass of colorful announcements tacked to it, with an array of eye-catching pictures and descriptions of incredibly exciting activities. Do not be strayed by these- they are trying to hide the one you are looking for. Look for a plain white sheet of paper almost completely covered by the others. Take note of the room number, then look at the time of the activity it advertises. The date will always be today’s, but if the time has already passed, then you are too late- they have caught you, and nothing you can do will keep them away.

If the time is later than what it is right then, start searching for the classroom. None of the wall-mounted directories are the same, and the numbering system is horribly random. You will likely never find the place, and will be lost searching for it among the endless halls while the hunters circle in.

If by some miracle you do manage to locate the room, ready a weapon and prepare yourself. If you didn’t make it before the listed time, the door will slam and lock, and nothing will ever convince it to open for you again. If you make it in time, take the door at a run, weapon ready.

A heavily decorated biology classroom will greet you. The room’s paint job is disgusting – rancid, vile colors drip freshly slathered from every surface. Posters line the walls, emblazoned with pictures of impossible, unholy creatures. Books in dark, lost languages lie scattered on the floor. Yet the room is empty – almost. At the far end of the room, a student sits hunched over one of the unspeakable creatures from the posters, frantically dissecting it with a long-bladed scalpel.

You must ask him the right question, or he will smash the creature aside and turn to find a new subject to dissect – you. At the top of your lungs, scream to him “Why did it not happen then?”

The student will scream, horribly, and whirl around. Time will seem to slow, and in one second he will tell you the hours-long story of why it did not happen then, and all the things that have gone wrong because of it. When he finishes, the creature on the table will whirl up and attack him, tearing him to shreds in seconds. His calculator will fly from the melee – grab it quickly, but dare not to open it. With whatever weapon you have, target the thing’s head and aim to destroy, or it will do the same to you. Whirl for the door – the rest of the class has arrived. They all brought their dissection kits today, but you’ve ruined their only subject- and now they want you to replace it.

Battle your way out of that classroom. The topography has changed. Where once endless, grotesquely painted halls stretched, a single, bare concrete walkway stretches across a pit of flames to a steel door. Fight your way over there – do whatever it takes to get through that door. The moment you grab the handle, everything will turn white. Shut your eyes.

Count to five, then open your eyes again. You will be holding the handle of the locker room door at the last school you ever attended. Open it and walk into the locker room. Pull the student’s calculator from your pocket, turn it on, and press the key labeled “Entry.”

A number will appear. Toss away the calculator and find the locker with that number on the door. It will be unlocked – open it.

The whetstone inside is Object 81 of 538.

82. Holder of Purity

In any city, in any country, go to any large school or university you can find. Once you locate the visitor’s desk, walk up to it and ask if “The Holder of Purity” showed up for school today.

If the worker nods, your fate is sealed – your quest is already known, and nothing you can manage will let you even get as far as the front door. However, if the worker shakes his head and goes back to his work, you are safe. For the moment, anyhow.

Casually sweep your gaze around the school lobby where you stand. No matter how it looked before, it is now beautifully decorated, with delicate draperies over precious, strange stone walls. Look around until you spot a door that stands starkly out among the design – a crudely built door of waterlogged, rotting wood. The handle is rusting away. Bugs unlike any this earth has ever seen crawl through the wood.

Immediately upon seeing the door, every fiber of your person will want to walk away and never look at it again. But if you truly wish to go through with this, you must overcome yourself and walk over to the door. Students, teachers, and staff will try to get your attention, try to get you to do something, anything other than opening that door, but ignore them. Get over there as fast as possible and rip open the door.

You may catch a glimpse of a darkened, twisted shop classroom before something unseen grabs you. The shrieks of the students and faculty are heard as black, grotesque shapes pour out of the room and your unseen captor pulls you in.

You won’t be able to see anything for about five minutes. Lucky you. A sickly, pale-green light will snap on and reveal your current position – strapped to the table of an enormous black drill press. High, high in the darkness above, a high-pitched, warbling whine is heard. The drill press is on, and your captor from before is slowly lowering it – and the enormous drill bit attached.

Very nearly any noise, any action, will cause your captor to shriek and slam the drill press down, impaling you with the whirling bit. Despite whatever massive damage that might do, you won’t die – which will only enrage him more. He’ll rip it back up, move you so that a different part of your body lies under the bit, and slam it back down again.

Only one question will not bring about your endless torture – “Why did they change?”

The lights will snap on, and the drill press will fall silent. Squeeze your eyes shut and do not open them again, for to stare at that corrupted room and its lone occupant for any length of time is to join them.

Your captor will sigh, then give you an answer so simple that it will seem impossible that no-one has figured it out already. You will hear one more quick shift, then the drill press screeching down one last time. No matter your resolve, the pain from this will be unbearable.

Scream and open your eyes. You are lying on a bench on the top level of a parking garage two miles from the school. The part of your body that got hit by the drill press last will still be throbbing with pain and feel swollen beyond belief. Sit up and check the supposed lump- it will come loose from its taped-on fastening and fall to the ground.

The rusted handle from the wood shop door, which you now hold in your hands, is Object 82 of 538.

83. Holder of Corruption

In any city, in any country, go to any sizable school or university you can find. After locating the front desk, walk up to it and ask to see the one who calls himself “The Holder of Corruption.” The attendant behind the desk will look down, then begin to scream. Close your eyes tight, you won’t want to see what they are doing. When the screaming stops, open your eyes.

You should be in a small, dark room, with wooden walls. There will be a solid looking door of copper and wood behind you. Walk up to the door, knock twice, and open it. You will be standing in the place you call home, but horribly distorted. You will recognize it, but it will be difficult to find your way. Everything will be decayed and rotting. Insects, rats, and all kinds of horrible things wander the house. The house will be buried deep underground, dirt blocks the windows, making it pitch black. You had better have brought a light. If not, the walls won’t exist, and you’ll wander for the rest of your existence, in the darkness, unable to die, or to feel weariness.

If you did bring a light, however, you are in luck. Quickly find your way to your parents’ room or, if you don’t live with them anymore, to your own room. On the bed will be a twisted visage of both of your parents, in one body. They will be naked, and smeared in horrible substances, filth, feces, blood, vomit, everything possible. They will be horribly gibbering your name. You cannot react to this at all. If you do, you will join them as one, and your mind and body will break slowly over thousands of years. You will know only torment, and the torment of all others to ever die.

Instead, resolutely stare them in the eyes, and ask them “Why did this come to pass?” At this point, they will split into two separate bodies, and tell you from beginning to end, then from end to beginning at the same time, why it came to pass. It will be a horrifying tale, because it will seem it is your fault these things happened. You will most likely go mad from guilt. If you do not, however, the two bodies will produce an hourglass, and place it on the floor. Thank them, and gently pick it up with both hands.

You will wake up in the place you call home laying on the floor in the most windowed room. It will be 3:32 in the morning. No light will come from the windows ’til the morning comes.

The hourglass is Object 83 of 538.

84. Holder of Dreams

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house in you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask to visit someone who calls himself “The Holder of Dreams”. The person behind the desk shall stare at you with piercing eyes, tell you such person is not there. Ask him or her, where can you find him, and you’ll be presented with a key, with a number attached to it.

Walk out from the building, into the street, and go north. If the street doesn’t go either north or south, go east, then turn north once you notice a street at your left. Keep walking until you see a hotel. Maybe you’ve never heard of it, maybe you never realized it was there, but this is your destination. Enter the hotel, speak to no one, and answer no questions asked to you by the employee in the lobby or the guests. Look at the number attached to the key, and find the bedroom’s door where the key belongs. Once you find it, open the door. Enter the hotel bedroom, and close the door.

You’ll want to wait until at least sunset, when the first stars show up in the sky. Turn off any mobile phones, don’t turn on the TV, and have no objects which can make sounds. Without changing clothes, lay down in the bed, and close your eyes. Even if you’re not sleepy, your mind will drift away, and you’ll be sleeping soon. Think of good things while waiting with your eyes shut, because if fear or bad thoughts emerge, it might be too late. They know you’re there.

If all goes well, you’ll wake up in the next morning. Leave the hotel with no explanations, return home, and resume your life, but be prepared. You completed, without knowing, a pact. Accepting this path has earned you horrible consequences.

Three people you know will die in the following days. They will die in horrible, disgusting ways you couldn’t imagine were possible. React no more than what is normal to a human. Go to their funerals, mourn for them. Keep moving with your life. Do not attempt to return to the hotel or back to the asylum, or it will be all over, and you will wish you had died the same way your friends or loved ones did. It would have been less horrifying.

After one week — seven complete days — you will see the death of the 3rd person. There will be no way to avoid it. It will be the person you most care for, and no matter how much you’ll try to stay alone that day, the person will still come to you, unaware of his or her fate. It doesn’t matter how he or she appeared, the person will be there. When it happens, while you’re unable to save the person, you cannot turn around or close your eyes, or you’ll suffer the same fate. It will be as though the entire legion of Hell came to consume your friend into pain, agony and despair until their last breath.

You must not scream, or react. Just watch. When all is over, when there’s nothing left but the mutilated corpse of your loved one, you’ll feel a hand tap your shoulder. Do not turn around, or the boned hand will grasp your neck, and death will be slow and painful. The figure behind will ask “Did you enjoy that?”

Do not answer. Instead, ask “How can I protect my dear one?”

The hand patting your shoulder will rise and point at the corpse. Approach it, and you shall see a faint light coming from inside their now decomposing chest. Reach for it, and remove a small silvery trinket from their flesh. Do not fret if it looks different from what you heard, for it is never the same for anyone. Once you do this, you’ll hear a pitched scream, and the ground under your feet will vanish. Keep holding the trinket tightly, and do not let it go, or you fall into the darkness.

You’ll wake up in the hotel bedroom. Check the calendar. Those seven days were a dream. Nothing happened at all, and your friends and family are safe and sound. But you’ll have the trinket in your hands.

The trinket is Object 84 of 538.

85. Holder of Sorrow

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house in you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask to visit someone who calls himself “The Holder of Sorrow.” The worker will frown and bite his lip. Hesitantly, he will lead you deep within the facility until you reach a rusted, charred iron door. He will open the door for you, and you must enter the darkness beyond it in complete silence. Once you are inside, the worker will quietly close the door and bolt it shut.

You will hear the many screams of tortured souls within a few meters of you. Should the screams stop at any time, quickly scream at the top of your lungs, ‘I do not feel sorry for you!’ If they do not resume, hope for a quick death, as it is useless to run. However, if the screams return, continue walking forward in darkness. Keep walking until you see a dim light glow in front of you. Once this happens, immediately halt and stare at it.

You will be tempted to look upon the faces of the tormented beings hanging on the walls, and they will plea for your help. Do not answer their cries, for if you avert your eyes from the light, your mind will instantly be shattered and you will reflexively begin to gouge your eyes out.

The light will reveal a man standing with his back to you, and his presence will cause the screams around you to subside. He will only respond to one question: “Who will be spared when they come together?” He will whirl around to meet your gaze, and answer your question with excruciating detail. Do not interrupt his speech. What would happen if you do could not be described by the most sick and twisted criminal in the history of the world.

When he is done, he will hand to you what appears to be an ordinary rock. He will back away from you, the glow of the mysterious light fading away. The words will begin to ring in your mind, “He who is without sin shall cast the first stone.” Close your eyes and count to ten. When you open them you will be standing in front of the front desk in the institution.

The stone is Object 85 of 538.

86. Holder of the Lens

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself into. When you reach the front desk, ask to visit someone who calls himself “The Holder of the Lens.” The attendant will not acknowledge your request at first, but you must continue to ask. When she raises her head, she will give you a questioning look, and ask if you are sure. If you have any doubt in your mind that you will not succeed, turn away quietly and never return. If you have no doubt of your impending victory, then give her a single nod. She will smile softly and lead you through a door behind the desk.

The door will open into a steel-gray hall, straight and narrow, barely wide enough for the two of you to traverse. Large mirrors, spaced at odd intervals along the walls, will reflect the two of you along the path; you must look in every one of them as you pass. Should one of the mirrors show that the attendant has disappeared, begin to pray, for you will not be long in this world. However, should it be you missing from the mirror, stop and turn to face it. The attendant will turn around and push it aside, revealing a darkened room. Make sure to thank her before you step inside; the powers in this place do not tolerate a rude visitor.

The mirror will slide silently back into place, coating the room in darkness, and a voice will begin to mutter nonsense words to itself for an indeterminate time. Should they stop, you must state calmly, “I am only here to see a friend.” If the voice returns, it will not be a whisper, but a roar of anger that will shred your body, leaving your soul to be slowly consumed by the Holder; if the room begins to light up, then you have intrigued him.

You will find yourself in a small, dimly-lit room, with only a single chair in the center of the light. Stand still, do nothing until a voice asks you to sit, then do so. The Holder will ask you many questions, and you must answer them truthfully, and not make any attempt to clarify their details, no matter how damning they might be. Lying to him will bring out his demon, and you want to avoid that for now.

When he is finished, he will thank you for your honesty, and tell you that he wishes to know why you came. Ask him, “May I see your face?” The Holder will laugh kindly, and a pair of glasses will drop into your lap. Take the time to think of the one thing that means the most to you, and put the glasses on.

Now you will see the room in whole, oozing pestilent blood from every inch of every surface, save the small ring of illuminated floor. Do not stand until the holder asks you to, and when he does, leap up onto the seat of the chair immediately. The light will go out, and blood will rush to fill the gap, but you will still be able to see through the lenses. Look directly ahead of you, and politely ask to see the Holder’s face again.

The blood that forms the wall will part like a curtain, and a figure will emerge. If it is anything but the figure that you pictured in your mind before donning the glasses, quickly remove them and throw them aside. If you are fast enough, the darkness will part to reveal the doorway of the institution you came to; count yourself amongst the most fortunate. Should you be too slow, then your blood will be added to the room’s – very, very slowly.

If, however, it is the object, step down from the chair. Your feet will touch the blood, but you will not sink. Take five steps forward and halt. The object, whatever or whomever it may be, will move to match your distance. Take three more steps, and wait for the object to move again, then take a single step. This time, when the object moves, you must ball up a fist and strike it with all of the strength you can muster. Hold nothing back, and press your fist through it. The surface will give way and shatter as glass, revealing a floating skull, with chunks of putrid, rotting flesh still clinging to its visage.

Pull your hand back immediately, and do not examine the wounds on your hand. Bow and thank the Holder as politely as you can. He will then ask, with horrid breath, if you wish to see your face. Politely decline, and begin to turn away. A hand will place itself on your shoulder, and the Holder will insist. Now, ask him, “How do they see?” The hand will then forcefully shove you down, and you will sink into the bloody floor. As you pass, press a hand to your face, and keep the glasses from falling away. They are all that protects you.

You will see scores of images, ghastly and demented, pass by your vision as you descend. In all of this, you must not avert your eyes in any way from these scenes, scarring as they might be, for one of them is you. As you pass your own mutilated image, reach out and touch it. The sea of blood will dissipate, replaced by complete darkness. When a door appears, open it. The light will be blinding, but you will find yourself safe, walking away from one of the institution’s restrooms. Remember to say “Thank you,” for the Holder has enjoyed your company.

The glasses you wear are Object 86 of 538, the Eyes of Clarity. When the time comes, you can see what they see.

87. Holder of Youth

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask to visit someone who calls himself “The Holder of Youth.” The attendant will choke back a childish giggle and rise from her seat, motioning for you to follow. Do so, but do not show any emotion other than annoyance, for there are creatures watching you, waiting for a chance to erase your mind and make you do their foul bidding.

The attendant will lead you through the facility, skipping merrily along and turning down hallways at a whim. Do not bother trying to remember the path, for it will soon be irrelevant. After what will feel like hours of walking, she will turn into an empty room and halt abruptly, announcing that you have arrived. Follow her in and shut the door firmly, then move aside. She will wait, rocking gingerly on her heels, then bounce towards the door, opening it with little more than a grin.

Through the door, there will be a lush meadow, teeming with vibrancy and life. Follow your guide through the frame and stop when she does. She will then glance around nervously, and lean towards you with apprehension in her eyes; she will speak a single, whimsical word, then depart, leaving through the door and closing it. You must make sure not to forget that word.

Walk forward with rigid, stoic paces, keeping an angry visage upon your features; the guardians here know you do not belong, but will be too afraid to strike . . . for now.

Continue walking until you reach a ring of flowers, and step inside it. They will all wilt suddenly, with the exception of one small portion. Go in that direction, and that direction only, for 44 paces, then stop, turn to your right, and walk another 44 paces. When you stop for a second time, turn completely around. You should be in a dense, verdant forest. If you are not, then the guardians have mustered their courage, and no power in this place will try to save you.

When you arrive, immediately take three steps backward; you should come to rest against a large tree. Vines and branches will snake over your body and hold you there, but do not struggle. No matter how tightly they constrict, you must not show your pain, but keep glaring forward, lest the tree decide to crush you on itself. When the growth stops, several children will burst from the bushes, laughing and playing, oblivious to your presence, and form a ring around the tree.

As they begin to dance around it, they will sing in pleasant voices, a silly children’s song, making the trees around them shudder with laughter. Whatever you do, do not speak or soften your face, but wait until the children pause and sit to catch their breath. One of them will finally notice you, and ask what you are doing there. Tell them that you wish to see Father, and they will gasp as one. Should they begin to giggle, then your death will arrive soon, by creatures which no words could ever describe.

Sternly tell them again that you wish to speak with Father, and their leader will hang his head glumly, muttering acquaintances to you. He will stand and walk away, leaving all the others around you. They will begin to speak, to themselves and you, but you must not look at them, listen to them, or even think about anything they might say to you; they only seek to break your stoic mask and flee their punishment. If their words should ever cease, then growl at them, “Stop pouting about it and enjoy yourselves.” You must sound as menacing as possible, and they will resume talking; no one knows what happens if they remain silent.

When the other child finally arrives, he will sit back down, and a tall, wizened figure will emerge from the thicket. He will stare at you, a gaunt, annoyed face that should match your own, and demand to know why you came here, of all places. Glare at him and ask, “Does it truly matter?” The figure will sigh darkly, and begin a long-winded rant about the follies of youth; stay silent, for he will not take kindly to interruptions. When he finally winds down, he will ask again why you are here. Ask him, “What were they before this?

The old man’s eyes will flash with understanding, and he will sit on a nearby stone and begin to speak. He will tell you, in every possible detail, what they were in a time before time, when there was still a shred of goodness within what they kept. He will explain, with a heavy voice, the calmer times, and tell you of the events that sparked their fall. Every slight, every delusion, every crushed dream will be laid bare by his words. As the old man speaks, the lush green around you will give way to blackened, dead soil, rotting trees, and foul, half-rotting vegetation; do not change your expression, and hold your gaze on the old man.

The story will end with “See what they have done to my children?” The small figures that sat around you will now be festering corpses, all eying you with gleams of sadness in their putrescent faces, begging for release. They will all stand, and trot toward you, with their Father telling you that their hunger must be sated. Now, in your loudest voice, scream the word you were told when you arrived. Should you have forgotten, or mispronounce it in any way, then you will spend the rest of eternity as the dead children’s meal.

Speak it correctly, and they should all fall to the ground, clutching their ears shut, and the constricting briars from the tree will shatter. Take the largest piece of wood that you can find, run toward the old man, and stab him in the neck with it. As he chokes on his own blood, he will hold a single rose aloft. Take it from his hand, as darkness will surround you, forcing you to choke and die like him.

When your lungs feel as though they shall burst, you will find yourself at the door to the place you call home, gasping for air and clutching the flower in your clammy hand.

That rose is Object 87 of 538, Forlorn Remembrance.

88. Holder of Void

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask for someone who calls himself “The Holder of Void”. The worker will look at you as if you’ve spoken another language. Repeat your request once more — any more, and your fate is best left unsaid, for our sake. The worker will stand, visibly shaken, and motion for you to follow. Do so, but look to your feet and carefully count your steps. Once your foot has fallen on the 64th step, stop. The worker will have disappeared.

Turn to your left, and knock thrice on the door in front of you. If there is no answer, turn around and try the same on the door behind you. If there is still no answer, then this game was not yours to play; you will wander the halls of the institution for the rest of eternity.

But, should a childlike voice ask you to come in, quietly open the door and step inside. The room will be simple, painted in solid ocean blue. There will be a child in the middle of the room, sitting at a table, playing what appears to be a cross between a board game and solitaire. The child will look at you with impossibly black eyes, eyes that seem to bore into your very soul and beyond. He will ask you, still staring, “Do you also want a card?”

The next few moments will decide your fate.

Stare into the child’s eyes, but do not make a sound. Breathe quietly. He will eventually sigh, and resume his game. He will pull a card out of a stack on the table.

Should that card have a picture on it, the child will sigh again, and throw the card to the ground. Whatever was depicted on the card will come to life — flee, if you wish. If you’re lucky, you will die of starvation and dehydration before the impossibly grotesque creature finds you within the halls.

But, should the card be blank, ask in a loud, commanding voice: “Why did they shatter?”

The boy will stare into you, into your mind, as if your very existence is being probed. Do not attempt to hide anything or fight. This Holder’s powers are more than what they seem, and you may very well lose your sanity where you stand.

If you are still coherent when this “examination” finishes, you will find yourself falling asleep. Again, do not fight the feeling.

You will wake up in the bed of where you call home, a small, round, pearlescent object in your hand.

This Object is 88 of 538.

89. Holder of the Heart

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask to visit someone who calls himself “The Holder of the Heart.” Should a look of disinterest appear on the worker’s face, be persistent and ask him again, but with a more determined tone. Don’t let that tone fade from your speech for a moment. They know you’re here, and they won’t hesitate to kill you where you stand. Once he gives in and gets up from his desk, follow him to the entrance of a very odd corridor, and he will stop. He will hand you a mask that has half of an odd symbol on one side and all black on the other. It’s best to put on that mask first before entering, as you don’t want them to see your face; they can tell you apart from a crowd pretty well. He will stand there, but it won’t be to help you.

Once you get to the end of the corridor, you will arrive at a wooden door styled in the times of peasants, kings, and knights. Knock twice, and say this exactly: “I wish to be complete, I do not mean to intrude.” Should you say anything else, that door will explode open, shattering to pieces, but you wouldn’t want to know what was on the other side. If you did say the right thing, however, the door will slowly open itself, and you will be pushed through by an unknown force. Don’t bother looking back, for there’s no one there. Yet. You will have arrived at a large clearing, and the door you were pushed out of will have disappeared from sight, with nothing left but a pile of ashes. Look around: you will notice a large castle – or what was left of it – beyond a humongous clearing. Starting from where you have entered this realm, walk until you get to that clearing and keep walking to that bare castle. Sleep where your body falls, and keep your mask on at all times. It’s the only thing that’s protecting you right now. It will be days, weeks even, before you reach the Castle; keep walking until you get to a bolted door. Knock twice, and say, “I have come for my Heart.”

There will be a sliding panel on the door, and it will open, revealing bright amber orbs in the darkness. Ask this only: “Do you have what I seek?” Ask anything else, and that door will open. You will never outrun what is on the other side. Should it grunt, it means that you have access to the Hallway. Enter, and the door will shut. The thing that possessed those eyes is nowhere to be seen. It’s better that way, for your own sanity. Here in this Hallway, everything is safe, so you are free to remove your mask and look around. On the left side of the Hallway, there is a beautiful mural that depicts very odd events and fights. On the last panel, you see yourself, but you are missing your face, and behind you is a horde of unspeakable things. Do not scream at what you see on the right wall, however, for that door that closed is now locked on the inside, but not on the out. And not even that mask will help you.

Take a good look at your mask after looking at the right-wall mural. The symbol on your mask should represent your purposes for seeking this Holder. Now look for it on the gruesome mural and say in a whisper, “I wish to erase this moment.” Some paint and paintbrushes will appear beside you, and you must paint over the symbol from your mask with the appropriate colors. Should you fail to match the colors or ignore this step completely, the demons that will break in soon will take notice, and they will know who you are. Once you are done and you are ready to receive the next object, take a good long look at the insignia on your mask. You will have to recall its name once you are face-to-face with him, if you can recognize it at all. Put on your mask and go to the door at the end of the Hallway. Knock thrice, and say, “I wish to obscure the sunlight.”

Say anything else, and the door will lock, the aforementioned front door will break, and not even the holiest of people would be able to save you from your fate. If you have said the right thing, the door will open, and the murals on the walls in the Hallway will have vanished, all but the object you have painted over. Close the door behind you and lock it with as many of the locking mechanisms as you can find. The room you entered is scrawled on with words, all having one cryptic message pointing to another, and another, and another. Don’t bother trying to understand these messages, for they will leave you mad and your understanding of life will have crumbled to pieces. Instead, look at the Holder before you. He is sitting on the floor, writing something incoherent with a quill pen and crimson ink. It seems to have just a bit left.

No matter how long it takes, wait until his ink is used up. Interrupting him will result in that very quill jabbed into your chest, and your blood will be drained from your body and used as the Holder’s new ink supply.

When he is finished writing and all his ink is gone, ask, “Why must the innocent suffer first?” He will get up, looking straight at you with ominous red eyes and then come so close to you he could rip the mask right off you. He will then explain to you, in great detail, the tragedies and deaths of people you know, people you don’t know, and people you wish you’d never known. When he is finished, he will step back and ask what you are. If you misunderstand the question and answer incorrectly, you’ll wish that the demons from outside had reached you first. Your answer must be “I am a ______!”, with the blank as the name of the insignia on your mask. He will then react horribly, his skin melting away and his eyes falling out with the membranes still hanging onto the eyeballs, then finally disconnecting themselves; his hair will all fall off, and his tongue will be forcefully ripped out.

His flesh, or what remains of it, is now all pitch-black and his sockets glow bright yellow, and his size would make even the largest demon tremble, but do not cower at his true form; he attacks only the cowardly, after all. With pride in your voice, shout again your answer, and he will knock a hole in the ceiling. A bright light will shine through and land on him, and the Holder will melt into a small puddle of black liquid. All that remains of him is a small keychain, with a shining red heart dangling from one of its ends. In front of you will appear an unlocked white door. Quickly pick up the keychain and step through the door with your eyes closed shut, as hard as you can. For about a minute or so, you will feel a falling sensation. Do not open your eyes, for you don’t want to know what you’re falling through, and doing so will trap you there for eternity. When you are face-down on what seems to feel like concrete, and you feel warmth on your body, you can open them. You are now outside the institution or halfway home, the very same one that you stepped in to, moments ago. The mask you are wearing will falls off, be burned by a black flame into nothing but ashes, to be blown away by the wind.

That keychain is Object 89 of 538.

90. Holder of the Seeker

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask to visit someone who calls themselves “The Holder of the Seeker.” A bored look will stretch across their face and they will ask you, “Friend or Family?” as they shuffle through their papers. Answer promptly, but calmly, that you are “The One Who Seeks.” They will shoot you a look that will make you feel as if you were already committed. Perhaps you should be if you are actually considering this voyage. The clerk will dismiss you, claiming to have no time for pranks. Do not press the issue. You will only be escorted out by the guards, and your attempt will be ruined. Leave at once, and place your hand on the door of the building. Many who have sought this Holder distinctly remember weeping bitterly at this point, though I doubt you will need to. Scream at the top of your lungs, with a voice enough to shake the stones “I know that they are real! Don’t let this end here!”

You will feel a hand on your back. Perhaps she will touch your shoulder or arm, or perhaps she will tug on your pant-leg. Turn to face her, although she will not be there. You will find a run-down shack directly across or down the road from you. If a forbidding air seems to push you away from it, you know you have found the place. If you wish to spare yourself the innumerable horrors of the 2538 objects, turn back now. No-one will think the less of you. However, if you are brave, steel yourself and knock upon the plastic-siding door.

It will slide back, revealing a beautiful woman in an elegant dress. Her eyes will be dark-ringed from lack of sleep, and red from crying for so many years. So many years. And those brown eyes were so vivid once. She will ask you if you truly believe in them. Tell her the truth, for if you are lying to her this day she will know, and your quest will end here. If you do tell her the truth, and she likes your answer, then she will invite you in. Remove your shoes once inside. She is a neat freak and would be angry if you tracked anything on the carpet. Yes, the inside of this ramshackle place will be opulent, bedecked in marble, gold, silks, and fine woods. Some exist here who remember building this for her.

Touch nothing as she escorts you into her lounge. Especially not the crystals. Once inside the lounge, sit at the low table as she reclines opposite you. This table is shaped like a bagua, with a crystal ball in the center and feet made from effigies of the other Objects. Do not look at them. Do not touch the ball. There will be time for this yet. She will ask you questions, deep questions about your dark secrets. Questions that will lay bare your every sin and failure. If she begins to cry, know this: she weeps for you, and she weeps for herself. Do not console her.

After a while, she will touch the crystal ball. Do so as well. She will ask your name. Give it in full. Your name will drift away into the crystal ball. She will ask your birthdate. Give it. It too, will drift away. She will ask you for your titles, your pseudonyms, your screennames, your nicknames. All will float away from you and into her crystal ball. When she bids you rise, do so, and follow her to her bedchamber. Here, she will lay out clothes on the bed and step outside, still clutching her crystal ball. Strip yourself naked in front of the mirror. Do not leave a single ring on your finger, or in your ear. You must be bare of all but your skin. Throw your clothes into the unlit fireplace. Dress yourself in the clothes that she laid out for you. Your fate will be sealed by the colors of the garments.

Lie down in the bed. Do not lie on your side or on your stomach, for if you do, you will stay there for all eternity, never able to sleep, but experiencing every nightmare there ever was or will be in every moment. Lie still for four minutes and thirteen seconds. If you stir, she will not come. When she does come she will be wearing the same clothes that you are, and her raven black hair will be deftly brushed. Her makeup will be done to a tee, and she will look ever so beautiful. This is your last glimpse of true beauty before your long journey of horror. She will toss your shoes into the fireplace and light it, burning all of your clothes and belongings. She will then lay down next to you in the bed, smoothing back your hair as a mother might her child. Watch in stillness as hundreds of grotesque servants enter the room. Do not look them in their pain-wracked eyes. Do not listen to their sullen murmurings. For if you do, they will make sounds that will slowly and painfully melt your every bone. They will then take your frameless form from the bed and consume you alive, inconsiderate and unworthy person you are.

As long as you do not do these things, and you allow her to pet you, and you stay absolutely still, you may watch as these servants in their black clothing bring in your every belonging and throw it into the fire. Do not weep for the loss of these things. The worst is yet to come. When all your things have burned to cinders, she will roll over and straddle your waist. She will then poke and prod your muscles and nerves. At times she will seem to poke at your very marrow. She will then rise to her full height and say, “You know what it is you must ask. Ask it.”

Ask her “Am I the One Chosen to Seek Them?”

This may yet be your last moment with your mind, heart, soul and body intact. She will likely begin to cry ever harder. Her tears will splash down on your chest. She will begin to massage her tears into your skin. If at this point her nails dig into you, know that your every lie this day has been discovered. Foul creature, how could you lie to her? Her tears will leak into your veins and dissolve your will into a screaming husk, and you will serve to carry people’s belongings for all eternity, but never have any of your own.

She may look down at you in pity, for you have come so far and experienced unimaginable horrors, and have even told the absolute truth to her, but you are not the Chosen. She will apologize for what has been done to you and what you may have been forced to do. She will then ask you, “Do you want to forget?” You may respond in one of three ways. If you say yes, all your belongings will be returned to you. You will be returned to your home, and will have no memory of the Holders, the Objects, or the horrors you have witnessed in seeking them. If you say no, as some do, her house will vanish from around you. You will have no clothes and no belongings, but you will have knowledge of the Objects as well as whatever Objects you have already collected. If you seek to collect them for personal gain, this is the option to choose. However, you may say “No, but I wish to aid the Chosen”. In this case, she will tell you the name and location of the Chosen. You must immediately seek him out, tell him of the Bride, and turn over to him whatever Objects you possess. After this, as with the “yes” answer, you will be returned to your home with all your belongings and no memory of the Holders.

If, however, she bends over and kisses you on the lips, and your white garments touch hers, know that you have been chosen. She will tell you of the Holders who have been lost to documentation. She will tell you the proper order in which to approach the Holders, so that you may seek Them. And by seeking Them, seek Him. She will then whisper into your ear your new name, your name as the Seeker of Holders. Know now that every person who knows of you will not remember any name, pseudonym, nickname, or screenname you gave or ever will give them. Only your name as the Seeker of Holders. If you stand at the footsteps of any mental institution or halfway house and ask the wind to bring you the Bride of the Seeker, her home will appear for you as a haven from your troubles.

You are now object 90 out of 538, the Seeker of Holders.

91. Holder of Honor

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask to visit someone who calls himself “The Holder of Honor.” The attendant will look up from his papers and hand you a thick Tarot card. Should you be given the Moon card, then know you are ready to face this trial; however, if the attendant passes you the Devil card, turn away, and do not return until you have lived through another of the Holders’ ordeals. Only with their infernal strength will you survive this task.

If you remain, the attendant will ask you to check the church at the end of the street, and return to his paperwork. Leave the building and walk leisurely down the street, and enjoy what may be your final moments alive. When you reach the end of the road, you will see an old, dilapidated structure that may have been a house of worship a long time past. Enter the door carefully, lest the frame collapse on you.

You will be surrounded by light, and taken to the place where the objects you have gathered lay before you, along with two doors. Know now that if you lack the Cloak, the Beast’s Resolve, the Shield (Holder of Solitude or Holder of the Shield), or the Sword, then take the door on the left and leave, for you are doomed to fail. If you possess one or more of these Objects, then choose one and enter the door to your right.

You will pass into a hellish expanse of wasteland, its horizon surging with infernal flames and showers of blood pounding the barren ground beneath your feet. Far in the distance, a tall structure juts out, its stark and polished whiteness blaring its presence to everything here. And, rest assured, you are not alone.

You will only have a handful of seconds to take in these sights before a horde of demons begins to rush towards you. If you carry the cloak with you, drape it over yourself and walk towards the building; the creatures are an extension of the Holder, who sees you through their hatred. Otherwise, arm yourself with the plain sword that appears at your feet, as the king’s blade will not come free should you wear it. The demons are numerous, but frail; they exist only as a thought, and one stroke will cleave them apart.

No matter how you do so, it will take a very long time to reach the structure, but you will never find yourself tired from the exertions of moving or fighting – conflict is the food of life here, and you are part of its source. When you climb onto the first step of the entrance, the endless swarm of creatures pouring from its doors will finally halt, and the crowd that eagerly pressed against itself to flay you will calm and watch your every movement as you ascend to the large, opulent doors. They will part as you walk, forming a silent, vigilant ring that urges you toward their keeper.

The inside is just as lavish as its outer shell, dressed in fine fabrics and frescoes, beautiful statues, and beautiful mosaics inlaid into the floor. The Holder’s minions will form a solid path from which you should not dare deviate; they are much more resilient here, within their home. Follow your only sensible option for as long as it leads you but do not turn back or make to leave. Your passage will lead to a spacious and stark room, dotted only by a throne and two figures; a naked, beautiful brown-skinned woman reclining in the seat, and a pale man bedecked in armor, kneeling on the floor in front of her. Instantly, you will feel a lust you have never felt before. Ignore it, or you will be flayed by the knight for your insolence.

Instead, state without fear that you have come to answer the challenge. With a wave of the woman, the knight will rise, don a helmet, and bring sword and shield to bear. Should you possess the sword, the blade you were given will morph into a round shield, and your own weapon will let itself be drawn. Should you lack the sword, the knight will toss one to you a shield, letting it slide to a halt at your feet. One way or another, when you have equipped yourself properly, a suit of half plate will form around you, and the knight will charge.

Now, it is up to you and your skills. If you chose the sword, know that his armor alone will not save him, as the king’s blade will batter and eventually pierce the heavy metal. If you opted to take the shield, then do not fear the knight’s blade, for it cannot break the hellish protector. But whatever you decided, be aware that the knight is a very formidable opponent; he will use any means he can to defeat you, whether it be his blade, his shield, or punishing, steel-hardened strikes from his hands and feet. To best the knight, you must cleave his sword arm from his body; only then will he yield, kneeling to you and ignoring the mangled, bleeding stump.

If you are victorious, the woman will rise and walk towards you. Kneel, and hold your weapon tight in your hand. She will tell you “Obey the strong; destroy the weak.” Now, ignoring your temptation, ram the blade through her gut and wrench it upwards; heeding your temptation will only result in your being lost in eternal bliss, and any objects you have collected will return to their holders. As her body slumps to the floor, sheathe your blade and offer the knight his missing arm. As he holds it back to the wound, his armor will shatter, revealing him to be a humanoid figure with fire-blackened skin, golden hair, and deep amethyst eyes that bore into your soul.

He will compliment you on your fight, and on seeing through his master’s illusion. He will speak, in length, of the measures that were placed in this realm to guard the Object here, and how he extended them through himself. When he finishes, he will permit you to ask one question. You must request of him, “Why do you follow Him, my lord?”

The Holder will seat himself as he tells you, in a gravelly voice that holds the weight of ages of vows, how he fought his way into His favor, and describe, in painful detail, how he fought Him and lost. The words will take shape as the hell knight speaks, burning the images of the entire story into your memory. The Holder will explain the agonizing torture he suffered, and you shall feel his pain as he speaks. If your mind cannot endure this, then you will take the dead woman’s place as the Holder’s next decoy, but if you persevere, then the Holder will tell you the vow he took to escape the unending torment.

When this is finished, he will stand and offer you the only remaining piece of his armor; the gauntlet, which is still pristine despite the battle. Replace yours with the one you are offered. Then, the Holder will advise you to arm yourself again, for you must fight your way to the entrance of his home. Only when you are ready will he order his minions to attack.

If you chose to carry the Beast’s Resolve, it will manifest itself now, surging though your body and lending you the strength of the most fearsome of demons. Otherwise, it will be a long and savage battle to the front door. If you manage to reach the foyer alive and rend through the frenzy around you to the door, white light will surround you, yanking you across dimensions and dropping you outside the wrecked church. Everything will be gone, your chosen Object returned to its place of Holding, but the knight’s gift will remain.

That gauntlet is Object 91 of 538, the Hand of Obedience.

92. Holder of Salmacis

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house. Go immediately to the front desk and ask the clerk to let you visit “The Holder of Salmacis”. Should they look you up and down, judgmentally, you have come to the right place. They will push a hidden button. Stand perfectly still. The janitor will come and escort you into an adjacent hallway and through a door. Once through the door, he will take you by the shoulders and ask you if you have met with the Holder of Passion. Answer honestly. If your answer is no, he will shove you out the door. Run fast and run far. Do not stop until the sun sets twice, for every plant in the city will wish to crush your body to bloody dust.

If your answer was yes, he will take you deeper into the complex. You will hear a variety of screams, both male and female. If you were to look into the doors of the hall, you would see in each a man and a woman, sewn together in every grotesque manner. Do not look in those doors. If you do, you will be taken into one of them and sewn to another person without anesthesia, and they will forever struggle to pull away from you, tugging at the seams until your skin threatens to tear.

Since you did not look in, the janitor will take you to the end of the hall. He will take you through another door, and take you by the hand. He will ask if you have met with the Holder of Innocence. Answer honestly. If your answer is no, he will glare at you angrily and smash your head against the door until your brains cover you. This hall will not allow you to die from this, and instead you will lay there for all eternity without the ability to move or ponder anything beyond your own pain.

If your answer was yes, he will take you down this new hallway. It will appear to wind and twist, like a serpent coiled around a cylinder. Do not be fooled. This hallway is straighter than any arrow. Step off the true path and you will fall for all eternity. When you reach the end he will ask you one last question. “Have you met with the Holder of the Triskelion?” Do not answer! This is a trick, one that will cost you your life unless you discover its secret. There is no Holder of the Triskelion. Instead, you must hold up either Object 5 or 13: The Eye of Light or the Shattered Hourglass of Darkness. If you say anything or hold up any other Object, even those in the deepest pits of hell will weep for you.

He will take you within one final door and lock you inside. This room will be pitch dark and empty, save for the door, a chair, and an antique clock. Sit in the chair and pat your inner thighs thrice. Turn the chair to face the clock, then stand and move the hands of the clock back four minutes and thirteen seconds. The door will slide away and reveal a hallway different from the one you were in before. This forgotten hallway will appear run-down, save for the ivory statuettes of both men and women flanking you along the walls. Though beautifully carved, these statuettes will have their faces wracked with the pain of child-birth. Yes, even the male statues will have distended bellies from a child their bodies should never be able to bring to term, and they cannot push them from their bodies. Do not touch these statues.

Run now, down to the end of the hall. Do so quickly, for time has begun again and your window is short. At the end, you will find a chainsaw with a diesel engine. Start it up. Slash and carve away at all the statuettes. do not let a single one survive, and do not let a single shard of them touch you. If you failed in this, the statuettes will grow to full human height and set upon you, and will do every manner of unclean act to you. When they are finished, you become just as them. Forever giving birth, forever defiling, never free. Pray this is not your fate and you still have time to return to the room with the clock from whence you came.

Sit in the chair and face the clock, but do not let the chainsaw stop running. The clock’s gears will fall down, forming a mouth full of gear-teeth. This mouth will pucker. Lean down and kiss it. Be sure your eyes are closed and your kiss is passionate. Accept its porcelain tongue in your mouth as you would a lover. If you do not, those same gears will pulverize you slowly. Do not stop kissing if arms wrap around your shoulders, or porcelain legs around your waist. This is the Holder of Salmacis.

She will appear as a perfect doll woman, a mannequin correct in anatomy down to every inch. All save for a bracket just above her nethers. Do not stare at this bracket. Stare only into her eyes. “Only the Seeker of Holders should have made it this far,” she will say, “Are you the Seeker?” Tell her the truth. For your punishment if you are not will pale in comparison to the seven hells visited upon you for lying. If you are the Seeker, she will begin to talk. She will tell you of her twin sister, the Bride and Holder of the Seeker. She will tell you of her many surgeries. She will tell in vivid detail of her slow transformation into a living doll. Each cut and seam made without anesthesia. Do not listen, or your body will undergo the same surgeries as she speaks them. Instead, squat down and pat your inner thighs once per second, 253 times. When you have done this, she will be done speaking. Ask her, “How may I deliver our last hope?”

She will smile at you and reach up, grabbing unseen handles in the ceiling. She will lift herself into the air, but her legs and waist will not come with her. Now you must complete the body. Place into the pelvis Object 18, the Uterus of Passions. Attach to the bracket Object 19, the Phallus of Innocence. She will then descend and reattach. Quickly, hold her close to you, for a circle of sharp blades will fire up from the floor, carrying with it crimson silk.

Do not let go of her. Ignore the searing, slicing pain in your legs and abdomen. Clutch her close. Ignore the spray of blood from your chest. If you were to let her go now, this pain would be yours eternally. She will then step back, and drop to the floor. Her pelvis will be missing, and her breasts will be gone. She will be dead. The searing pain in your loins and chest will subside, but do not look down! If you do so now a madness beyond all others will take you. The silk ring will twist and twirl, tightening into rope with you still inside. Do not panic. Do not struggle. When it seems you will be crushed, the silk will slip around you. You will find yourself standing before three doors. Two will be restroom doors. One will have a strange mark.

Take the center door with the mark. You will find yourself in a restroom, similar to a men’s restroom, but sweet smelling, and with a dispenser for feminine hygiene products. Go into one of the stalls and look down. The pelvis you constructed in the Holder of Salmacis, as well as her breasts, are now yours. Become acquainted with your new body. When you are done, leave the restroom, and you will find yourself in the lobby of the mental institution.

Her pelvis is object 92 out of 538. With it, you may bear the child of Passions and Innocence.

93. Holder of Slaughter

In any city, in any country, go to any wedding you can get yourself into. Walk up to the stage and ask the organ player to see someone called “The Holder of Slaughter.” Should he give you a sly grin, you have come to the right place. With a wink, he will pass a machete to you from under the keys, and tell you to lock the doors. Stride purposefully to every door and make sure they will not open, and do not worry that anyone will see the weapon. Tap the hilt of the blade to every locked door and every window; this will ensure that no one escapes.

When you have done so, move to the farthest row of pews and stand in the aisle until the organ player strikes up a mournful, haunting melody, much to the confusion of the assembled well-wishers. Wait for exactly twenty-nine measures to pass. When the thirtieth measure begins, lift the machete over your head and strike the first person who is within your reach.

Amid the terrified screams, the music should become louder, ringing through the pipes with force enough to shake the entire church to the foundation. Now, you must, with great leisure and deliberation, move back and forth along the pews, slashing at every occupant of the building. You must show no mercy, no hesitation, only a slight bemusement at seeing the floors, and your body, washed in innocent blood. If you allow even the smallest hint of mercy to enter your mind, the forces in the blade will consume your soul, torturing it with endless guilt and agony, while your body becomes their tool.

As you sweep along the rows, you may hear the preacher continuing to speak, highlight all of the best deeds of humanity and citing many things you and your family have done; listen not to his sermon, for he knows this game well, and is trying to confuse you into pausing. When the rows are clear, kill anyone standing at the doors, and watch them scramble to the main aisle, gathering in front of the podium. Flames will leap from the keys of the ancient instrument as you methodically walk towards them, outlining the few remaining survivors. Give them your maddest grin and tell them, soothingly, “Only the tainted fear death.”

Lash out and cleave the groom’s head in two; killing anyone else with this blow will alert Heavenly powers to your presence. The man’s head will explode, but the body will turn and leap to the preacher. Spikes of bone will erupt from the corpse, severing many of the elderly man’s arteries; now, you may finish off the rest of the guests, but save the bride for last.

She will fall to the ground, weeping uncontrollably; kneel down to her and pull her head to face your gaze. Kiss her on the forehead, and ask her where God is. If she begins to laugh, then He is here, and will exact a punishment that will rival all the pains of the Old Testament. Should she cry harder, wailing with grief, then pull her gently to a stand and embrace her. The organ player will now rise, a corona of fire wreathing his body, allowing the instrument to play itself, and walk down the stairs to you with an outstretched hand. Give him the machete, and do your best not to feel any regret.

Flames will surround the weapon, and he will ram it through both of you; the bride will be in too much pain to scream as both of your bodies are burned to ash. If you have any remorse at all for what you have done, then this pain will only be the beginning of your eons-long torture. If you have none, then it will feel as if the fire has permeated your very soul, obscuring your vision with a red haze. Then, like a wisp of smoke, they will be gone, and you will see the church again, only now, it is an effigy of hell.

The walls are now crafted of flesh, oozing blood and pus from countless gaping wounds, fire sprouts up from the floor with no warning, and the air is heavy with the cries of thousands of tortured dead. All of the revelers are chained to crudely formed pews of bone, impaled in every joint by nigh-molten skewers of steel. The bride will be before the podium, her limbs spread wide as she is secured to a rack-like device. Clusters of grotesque, malformed demons will peruse the crowd, randomly grouping together and ravishing the helpless souls, staining them with gouts of saliva, semen, and blood.

And in all of this, you must stand and watch, unfazed. Even wincing once at the various activities will cause the demons to mistake you for one of the guests, and subject you to the same treatment. After a handful of eternities, the demons will all converge on the bride, pleasing themselves in fashions that no ordinary human would be possible to achieve. Chunks of flesh, human and demonic, will fly through the air while they rape the woman’s soul. When all of them seem to stop, take four steps down the aisle; they will all disperse, leaving her covered in more fluids that you will be able to identify. The organ player will appear before you, saying that you have preformed a unique and kind service for him, and state that he will give you one concession for your deeds. Ask him in an even voice, “Why do they kill?”

He will look at you, clearly confused for a moment; ask him again, and he will break into a kind, fatherly smile, and explain, in a voice that is neither human nor demon, the multitude of reasons they have for seeing so many dead. Visions of great atrocities will swim in your mind as he speaks, picturing every one with you as their instigator; this may drive you mad, but if you are truly set in this path, you will see them as only a minor annoyance. When he has finished, he will tell you it’s time to go, and touch you on the shoulder; the pain of immolation will strike you again, and everything will go dark.

You will wake up the next day in the place you call home, with the morning’s newspaper beside you. Its headline will shout of the mysterious murders of an entire wedding party, with no suspects to be had; beside the paper, there will be a thank-you note with a signet ring attached.

This is Object 93 of 538, the Seal of Eternal Genocide.

94. Holder of the Self

In any city, in any country, go into any mental institution or halfway house you can get into. Go to the front desk and ask to see the one who calls himself “The Holder of the Self”. They will cock an eyebrow at you, then throw a bit of whatever they were eating at you and call you an idiot. Repeat your request, and they will relent. They will take you behind a door and waive you to an examination table. They will then leave, shaking their head at you.

Take off your clothes, although you may keep on your underwear if you choose. Lay back on the table, your arms at your side, and your legs slightly spread to the edges of the table. At this moment, dozens of monstrous hands will burst from the table, grasping with their jagged, filthy nails onto your body. Struggle all you like, you are theirs now. They will begin kneading your skin, pushing and twisting, tickling and caressing. More will erupt from under you, pushing into your back with their knuckles. If at this point you cannot stand the treatment, if you are far too disgusted by their attentions, merely say “I reject this test. End it.” They will pull at your extremities, ripping you apart joint-by-joint. This will be mercy.

If, however, you can stand this, say “I relax in your care, bring me to the Object, oh Holder.” At this point, five arms will erupt from the bed. Two will cover your eyes. Two will grasp your mouth and hold it as open as it can be. You will taste the salt and grime on their fingers. The last one will hold a bit of sweet fruit. It will dangle it across your tongue, and its juice will dribble into your mouth. You will want to hold this fruit in your mouth for a day, then begin to chew for the rest of eternity. Do not bite it. Do not savor its flavor. This is a trap. If you give in to this sweet fruit, your corpse will be as a sweet fruit for the million hands of the Holder.

If you pass this test, you will be rewarded. The hands will transform as they knead you. They will be as soft and delicate as a young maiden’s. Their nails will be perfectly trimmed and manicured. The smell of elegant perfume will gently waft across your nose. It will not be very powerful at all, but tantalizing. You will hear a chanting from inside your mouth, in a voice that is not your own. This is, was, the sweet fruit. It has now dried up into a small, ashy stone. It will chant of the heroes who tasted its brothers and sisters of yesteryear. Relax, for now the Holder is pleased with you.

When your relaxation has drifted you off into a state of utter bliss, the ash-fruit will be withdrawn from your mouth. The hands that held open your mouth will grip your throat tight enough that you cannot escape. The hands that closed over your eyes will open, but only far enough to see straight ahead. The hands that once caressed you will hold you tightly, almost painfully. you will be tilted into a vertical position and the long eye-stalks of the Holder will poke into your limited view. They will watch you: some of them critically, some of them angrily, some of them sympathetically, and some… some will look at you lewdly. Say to it, “May this body offend your eyes, oh Holder. Bring me the Object.” Pray that this is true, for if it is not, the Holder will rip out your arms and eyes, and you will forever experience life through it.

If you are indeed offensive to its eyes, you may still count yourself unlucky, for your quest will not end this day. From between your legs will erupt a pair of arms. Held in their hands will be a massive, jagged, ornate key. It will stab you in the chest, and rip out from you a glowing light. The wound where it plunged into you will be gone. The key will be tossed away.

The sphere of light will consume the key. It will take on a form identical to yours, and will dim until it is your exact twin. Your twin will discuss with you all manner of things. What it will say, none may know, except that to answer its questions and respond to its statements will slowly erode your every mental defense. Be perfectly honest with it, in precise and full detail. If you wish to laugh, laugh. If you wish to cry, cry. If you are enraged, yell. Hold nothing back. Focus only on your twin. Do not look at the eyes or hands, no matter what they do. Do not listen to the whispers coming from the hands on the side of your head. If you do, you will be crushed, and your twin will drink deeply of your blood.

When your twin is done with their conversation, it will revert to being a key. A small key. At that point, the hands by your head will say “Speak, for you have faced yourself.” Ask it only one question: “Who are we to Him?” The hands will hold your neck absolutely still. You will not be able to move your head. The hands will close over your eyes and mouth. You will be unable to speak or see. The hands will spread your arms and legs as far as they might be spread. You will not be able to move. You will feel something slimy sliding along the inside of your thighs. You will be unable to protest. At that point, the Holder will describe to you every single evil thing that He has done to humanity and every evil thing He will do to humanity. He will describe in vivid detail how each of the Objects will be used to discover and create new evils to perform and enact. Then he will describe, to your horror, the results of these evils. He will tell you tales of the husks of humanity as they spend the rest of eternity reenacting His work, writhing in an agony beyond all imaginable hells multiplied together. And then, beyond it all, he will tell you of the abominations reserved by Him for you, to be heaped upon you by those innocents you once held dear. Then, he will tell you what humanity is to Him. This knowledge alone may kill you.

Without warning, the hands will stretch you, pulling you apart until you think you might break. Then it will fold you at each of your joints until you are rolled in a ball. It will pull and stretch and twist your body every which way, and your body will scream in pain as the Holder discovers new ways to contort your body without destroying it. Then it will dump you on the floor.

You will be fully clothed, and in your pocket will be a small, jagged, ornate key; The Key of the Inner Self. With it, you will discover the inner truths of any person or object you stab with it. You may leave at any time.

That key is Object 94 out of 538.

95. Holder of the Purpose

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask to visit someone who calls himself “The Holder of the Purpose.” A look of pained depression will cross his face, and he will stand up and walk out of the room. Follow him out and down the hall. Eventually he will unlock a set of chained double doors, beyond which is another hall. The worker will go no further, pointing you down the hall before returning to his post. The lights further down the hall won’t seem to be working. Once you’re a ways in, the double doors behind you will slam shut. You will hear the rattle of chains on the other side.

Walk down the dark hallway. It will seem longer than the span of the entire building. Soon you will notice torsos on long chained hooks all around you. Even now they still live; their cries will rake your ears. No words escape their lips as they know no language. All they know is pain. Their eyes have been torn out and stream red tears of blood. Their hearts are exposed and still beat even with the cold metal chains impaled through them. Their arms end in bloody stumps at their elbows, and their bodies end at the base of their rib cage. They flail their stubs of arms; their heads squirm, crying for release from their cruel fate. Black, unnatural birds with curved talons and sharp, barbed beaks circle above. The birds feast on these bodies in small tortured portions. You will see that thousands of birds occupy this hall. Pay them no mind, and be as quiet as you can. If they notice your presence, they will cry for their keeper and you will join the ‘menâ’ in their eternal torture.

As you proceed down the hall, their cries will stifle behind you. The moment the last of the screams fade away, yell, “I only wish to know!” If a cloaked figure with huge terrible black wings appears in front of you, it is already too late. The keeper of the birds has found you. The chain he holds in his hands will be the one you hang from to feed his children. But if a bridge is revealed to you, cross it quickly. Across the bridge, there is a faceless man dressed in white. His body is sickly pale and bony. He holds a pair of scales made of white gold, with beautifully perfect designs. The craftsmanship put into making the scales is beyond comprehension. Do not stare at it long. Look directly at where his eyes should be and ask only one thing: “What is their purpose?”

He will hold up his scales in front of him and answer you. His explanation is not meant for human ears. The faceless man will defile and rape your mind as he forces it to comprehend the magnitude of the universe and all things, physical and planar, real and ethereal. You will scream as your one singular being is weighed against all things. This torturous mind raking will delve into your soul and go on for what seems like hours, perhaps days. His explanation will force you to realize how insignificant you really are, how nothing would have changed in the grand scheme of things if you had never been born. For a brief moment, you will understand the work and craftsmanship put into the scales. Your mind will be nearly torn asunder by the comprehension of this beauty and perfection. You won’t want to look away from it, for its enticing allurement will steal your breath away. Despite this, muster all of your willpower and avert your eyes.

When he finishes, most go insane from the maddening explanation; others sink into an inconsolable depression as his words echo in their minds forever. The faceless man calls the keeper for these people; they are fated to join the rest on chains. But if you manage to stand in front of him, look back into his face and then kneel before him, he will hand you the scales.

The scales are Object 95 of 538.

96. Holder of Rest

In any city, in any country, go to any hotel or bed and breakfast you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask to visit someone who calls himself “The Holder of Rest”. If the clerk ignores you, turn and leave and depart the continent as fast as you have the means to. Do not stop until you are across the ocean. Only the salt waters will save you from their wrath.

If, however, he should look at you and then return to his work, ask again, adding that you are a relative of his. The clerk will sigh and pull out a large book. Wait calmly, with your hands by your side, as he looks through it. Do not clear your throat, do not adjust your stance, do not show any impatience. After what seems like hours, the clerk will finally look up at you and tell you a room number. Do not forget this number. Thank him and turn from the desk.

Find the nearest staircase and begin climbing to the floor indicated in the first two digits of the room number. Pay attention, though, for the floors are not numbered in order, and you will not be able to go back. After climbing countless flights, you will reach the floor you seek. Go through the door and you will find yourself in a normal-seeming hallway.

Here, too, the numbering is not sequential and you will have to hunt for the Holder’s room. When you find it, knock twice and wait. Be wary, though, that you have the right room, for behind each of the other doors are horrors that will earn you the pity of those damned to Hell.

Should you have the right room, however, after ten seconds you will hear a man ask who it is. Do not reply. He will ask louder. Still, you must hold your tongue. Finally, you will hear him unlock the door. Before he opens it, quickly say, “You need no weapon, sir. I wish only to talk.” If you were not fast enough, be glad that the extraordinary pain will only last a moment.

Should you have gotten your words out in time, you will hear him stop and put something down. The man who opens the door will be dressed in a white shirt and suit pants, with his tie undone, as though he was just returning from a long meeting. Bow to him and ask if you may enter. Stand upright and look at his eyes while he looks you over. If he approves, he will open the door wider and wave you in. If he does not, he will slam the door and you will be forced to wander the hotel for the rest of eternity.

Once you are both inside his room, he will sit down on his bed and mute the television. Then, he will ask, “So, what is it you need?” Look him in the eye and reply, “Will I be able to rest?”

He will sigh and motion for you to sit down. He will then tell you about the others that have sought the Holders: their trials, their successes, and their inevitable failures. He will describe every detail, every movement, and every false move. Listen closely, so that you may not repeat their errors. Finally, he will tell you if you will ever be able to rest again. Know, though, that his pronouncement is final.

When he is finished, apologize for interrupting him, thank him for his time, and stand up to leave. He will ask you to wait a moment and pull something from the suitcase beside his bed. He will then throw you a pillow and wish you the best of luck.

Find the elevator and ride it to the ground floor, and you will be in the lobby of the hotel nearest your home.

This pillow is Object 96 of 538. When you are weary, sleep upon it and you shall be renewed.

97. Holder of Martyrdom

In any city, in any country, go to any mental hospital or halfway house in you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask the young man working there if you can see “The Holder of Martyrdom”. A most grievous look should overcome the worker’s face with a small smile of regret buried beneath. He will escort you to an elevator whose buttons go to up to 538. Press any button you wish, for your destination will be the same.

Once the doors close, you should hear a flurry of shrieks. If at any point, the shrieks change to babies crying, quickly press another button and yell, “She did it for the world!” If the door opens and there is a small man in a tuxedo, get ready to suffer through the same trials of Hell that she had to, something that drives mortals past death. However, if the door opens and you can still hear your better judgment reasoning with you to turn back, then you’re still alive.

Once you take a step off the elevator, your chance to turn back will have been revoked. Make your way down the pitch black hall that lies in front of you and touch nothing but the walls. At the end of the hall, there will be an empty room on your left. Feel your way into it. Slowly and silently open the door; beneath the dead window ahead should be a figure wrapped in bloodied bandages. Look only at her. Ask only one question: “Why did you fight so hard for it?” The bandaged figure should light the room, revealing the ten tortures she was put through, but do not look away from her. A smile should warm your soul and a smile should form on your face. If this does not happen, then your body will be replaced with hers, your blood will stain the bandages, and this place will become your new casket.

She will tell you her story and the plan they had intricately laid out in great detail. Listen well. When her smile disappears, you ought to hear the “ding” of elevator doors opening. Grab the bandage that covers her mouth, and run like hell back to the elevator. Let’s not talk about what will happen if you do not make it.

That bandage is Object 97 of 538.

98. Holder of the Second Seed

In any city, in any country, go to any mental institution or halfway house you can get yourself into. Ignore the attendant and talk to everyone in any visitor’s area. Learn their stories, why they are there, what their relationship with the person they are visiting is, what they would give to have it all turn out okay, and if they know “The Holder of the Second Seed”. After you are done, there should be a single person waiting there that wasn’t there before, a sweet looking thing with cold eyes. A definite form is undetermined at this point. Upon talking to him or her, he or she will ask you about these people you have talked to. At every wrong answer, they will make the condition of the person you answered wrong on noticeably worse.

Upon your finishing this quiz, they will open a bathroom door and ask you to join them. The door should lock behind you. The bathroom will be nothing special at the beginning, same florescent lighting, same mirrors, same tiled floor and ceiling. He/she will pull you into a stall and lock it closed. At this point you shouldn’t say anything if you value your sanity. They will start to talk about the history of the medical practice. In grotesque detail they will tell you about every ailment, every experiment, every person who considered him- or herself a doctor, every tiny adjustment made to a medicine because of the expiration date. This will last for days, so don’t feel bad about falling asleep; they will simply continue from where they left off when you fell asleep. You may leave the stall, but the bathroom door will remain locked. You must listen to their story in full before you are allowed to leave.

At the end of their long and droning explanation of medicine, you are free to leave, but if you do, you lose any chance of getting the Object. If you remain in the bathroom, they will then ask you what you’ve came for. You should reply with one of two phrases: “I seek only that which can stop the others,” or “I seek to join them in His presence”. He/she will react to the former and the latter differently.

If you chose the former, then they will try to kill you on the spot. With his/her bare hands, they will break a mirror and try to stab you with a shard. You must get a piece and try to stab them first. If you do, aim for the head, but not the eye. Should you survive, they will apologize for their actions, but you must then save their life using everything you know, which is now quite a bit. If you fail, your soul will be lost and left to wander the building. If you succeed, they will then do everything in their power to make you stay of your own will. Many go mad trying to resist. Others try to kill him/her again, and others still end their own lives. If, by the end of their treatment, you still live freely, you will be forced to look its true form straight in the eye. You will feel lost in its eye as it gazes at every sin you have ever committed, every travesty, every little bruise and bump. Any reaction that shows weakness will keep your mind, body, and soul tortured throughout eternity. If you waver, you are never leaving that room whole. If you persevere, the bathroom door will open, and you will be free to leave.

If you choose the latter phrase, however, you will be rewarded by a visit with any or many other Holders you have encountered in the past. You will find yourself restrained in an old field, its contents dead or dying, and you will be sent through their tortures again and again until death is a happy illusion. After they have had their fill, the Holder of the Second Seed will question you again on any random person in the visiting area. Any wrong answer and the problems of the people in the institution are yours now, but they at least go free. From that point, you will have two more options. The first is to leave and obtain the Object. The other is to be relieved of the illnesses you now have. This involves a series of electro-convulsive therapy sessions and several surgeries sans anesthesia. The process may drive people madder, but if you are tough enough, you will survive and be healthy again. You will be free to leave.

If you chose to obtain the Object, then when you go to bed that night, you will hear a soft word from him/her. When you wake up, you will find a large dark book with instructions on how to grow plants that should have never existed. This Book tells how to grow and cultivate the Seeds of specific plants to breed the First Seed.

This book is Object 98 of 538.

99. Holder of the Remains

In any city, in any country, go to any graveyard or cemetery you can get yourself to. When you reach the site, find the gravedigger and ask to visit someone who calls himself “The Holder of the Remains”. At first, the digger will ignore you. Do not say a word. Just stand there and watch him. Soon, the digger will grab a nearby shovel and lantern, and walk out onto the graveyard. Follow him, and be respectful to the graves as you walk; disturbing one will enrage the souls buried here. After a long walk, the digger will stop at an isolated, unmarked grave, and start digging. As he does, night will fall quickly, lights will douse themselves, and soon, it will be pitch black, with the only light coming from the lantern the digger brought.

If, for any reason, the digger stops digging, say, “It must be done! I just want to talk.” If the digging continues, you are in the clear. If the digger does not resume, run, and stop for no reason. Get as far away from the graveyard as you can. If morning comes, you managed to escape. If your world is forever dark, then they will not stop until they find you.

Several hours will pass as the digger finishes. He’ll crawl out of the now deep, unmarked grave. Inside, there will be a simple wooden coffin. Jump down and open it; within will be a beautiful woman. Her skin is cold as death and white as the palest moon. There is only one thing to ask: “What awaits them?” If you say or do anything else, the digger will knock you out with his shovel and bury you alive.

The moment you finish the question, her body will decay rapidly before your eyes. Do not turn your eyes in disgust; you must honor her and watch her return to the earth, even the coffin rots away into the ground and her bones disintegrate. Although it is dark, the light from the lantern is enough to see. When the process is complete, a white rose will grow from the ground. It is beautiful, with a pristine bleached bud and a long green stalk. The petals are cold to the touch. Be careful of its thorns. Pluck it and exit the grave. The digger will be nowhere to be found; his shovel and lantern have likewise disappeared. Smelling the flower yields a heavenly scent, warming your soul from within. If you examine the grave that you just exited from, you will find that it has been reburied, and looks as though it were completely undisturbed. Upon the once-blank tombstone, however, are the words, “They must never come together. Never.”

The white rose is Object 99 of 538.

100. Holder of the Tower

In any city, in any country, go to any high security prison you can get yourself to. When you reach the front desk, ask to visit someone who calls himself “The Holder of the Tower’. Almost immediately, the guards will arrest you and admit you to the prison on death row without a trial. Your cell with the other death row inmates will be on the bottom level underground. Do not leave the cell. Do not eat any food or drink any water. Doing so would submit your inevitable doom on death row and lead to tortures best not written down. Stay awake as long as you can without sleeping. When your body collapses from exhaustion, you will fall into a dreamless sleep. When you awaken, your cell will be open, and the prison will be filled with a very thick fog. Walk out of the cell and go straight. It will soon become obvious that you are no longer in the prison; the cell behind you will quickly fade back into the fog.

The shape of a large building will signal your arrival. Drawing closer reveals that it is leaning ever so slightly to the side, and a large portion of it is actually buried into the ground you walk on. Despite part of it being entombed in the earth, the top is shrouded in fog and is impossible to see. Find a window and climb in; the door is buried below you, and unusable. There will be a nicely dressed old man waiting inside. He will greet you and begin to walk; the inside will be pitch black save for a small sphere of light emanating from a candle the man holds. Follow him and ask. ‘Where were they separated?’

He will tell you in articulated detail the cruel story about the unforeseen separation of all the Objects. The horrors described are unfit for human words. Imagery crawls into your mind like an urchin into your ear as he tells you the tale of the tower where they were separated to end it all. He will go on to reminisce, in a horrific reverie, what happened to the place they were separated. You cannot interrupt him, and you must stay within his small sphere of light, for it is all that keeps the darkness away. Unrelenting terror hungers there. When he finishes, you both will arrive at a room. In the room will be a bloodied guillotine. The man will turn around and pull out a pocket watch. He will look at it, and tell you that it is time.

The pocket watch is Object 100 of 538.